Available Balance
Happiness Day March 20: Are you happy?
March 23, 2017
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Probably that is a question only you can answer better than anybody else but I was astounded to read that I, I mean Indians stand at 118th spot in the world at the scale of happiness. As per the report of World Happiness this year released just before the UN World Happiness Day on 20 March, we are lesser happy compared to last year.

Strange, but I will not question the authenticity of the surveyors because we are still better than 39 countries. However but baffles me is that all our neighbors are happier than us including Bangladesh, Pakistan and China. Even countries like Somalia, Iran and Palestine are better placed than us.

As I said I will not question the report but would like to see what they take into account while try to ascertain the level of happiness for a particular country. I think the particular section of United Nations Organization responsible for this study takes into account different aspects of human life like education, social security, social and economical status of citizens of a particular country.

I am not sure if the UNO did a survey in right places before declaring their result because nobody came to me for my opinion from this or any other organization so at least they can’t say I am one of those who is not happy lol. On a serious note if they found citizens of Switzerland or Denmark the happiest people In the world I have nothing to express dissatisfaction or annoyance about but Palestine… no way.

They have taken many things into account like per capita income, life span, social security and citizens’ capability of self-decision. I have nothing against the report as they can keep any country in their list as they have a pen and they have a paper. But I don’t see any reason for us going so low in that list. India is one of the fastest economies with largest middle class. But as I said they have their own reasons to place any countries anywhere in that list.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/child-christmas-girl-people-season-577010/

Art of Living- Happy versus Sad
March 23, 2017
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I am a bit confused watching all the bad things happening in our surroundings including murders, crimes, rape, political disturbances, and anarchist activities by ruling and opposition political parties, students and even by government employees involved in corrupt practices.

I am not saying that there are no happy people around us living happy and comfortable life but they are too few in comparison. Probably they are the ones who know how to live a happy and satisfied life. Probably they know the art of living or they are brought up in the right manner with no negative feeling for life or the society they live in.

Actually you live a life exactly the way you feel about life and if you have a happy mindset you face no problem setting your problems aside or find something positive even out of a situation not so favorable. I am sure most of you might not have heard what François Gautier a French writer based in India married to a Sikh lady once said, “The flowers blossom naturally but we can help by watering them”.

A person has to decide which side he is on or what he choose for himself a happy life or a life full of unfulfilled desires, full of stresses. Life is full of happiness and worries but the choice is entirely yours which one you chose to nurture for yourself.

Actually the reasons are not big or small but we make them look so. You see some of us are sad because we have a small family and some others are angry because they have a very large family. One is happy because he is successful while others are not happy because they are jealous of successful people.

However, most of us forget the basics of unhappiness that joy and sorrow are very much part of our lives and we have to deal with them. No one wants to think that most of the problems we face are self created and one can handle them with little bit of self efforts.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/boy-son-family-happy-child-people-476092/

 

Satisfaction, Happiness and Gratitude- Smile
March 23, 2017
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What do you feel you need in life to stay happy and cheerful? If you ask me I have a simple answer for that, I feel I can manage to stay happy if I keep my smile intact and learn to be grateful. And here I certainly do not have religion in my mind but everything that counts in my life or motivates me to live a cheerful life.

I personally feel that smile has great power of expression. I use this power when I have no words for expressing myself then I give a hearty smile and that solves my purpose. The person whom I wish to convey my message of my gratefulness knows my feelings. I can go a step further and say that the words sometimes can be misinterpreted but smile is always at the right target. It never fails. I believe the smile is as important for human being as sun rays or air.

A smile is good not only for you but for your entire family that keeps them in good mood and health because a smiling face is always a sign that indicates the level of satisfaction of all the family members. I have a firm belief that a family needs money to live happily but if there is no satisfaction or family members have affection and love for each other money will work only partially. A smile is a good indicator of happiness level.

You always see two different kinds of people in your surroundings one that keep smiling and when they come near you get a different feeling of happiness or you feel like a pleasing music is playing around you but when you see people ranting or yelling never satisfied types you feel you should get rid of them as soon as possible. Smile is a weapon that can win over your worst enemy.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/warrior-fantasy-woman-fighter-hero-1872975/

We all have a hero within us
March 23, 2017
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There comes a time when a person fails to understand what went wrong for him or why the things stopped working well for him. He simply fails to cope with such situation because that was absolutely unexpected. In fact, he was in a situation when the mind stops working or able to think any proper solution how to come out of that situation.

It’s common but in some cases the suffering brings out a ‘hero’ from within us and trust me there is a ‘hero’ in all of us but the only thing is that most of us are not aware of his presence inside us. By the way, this is not only me but if you wish to know more about this ‘hero’ read the famous book, “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do”  written by Amy Morin.

It’s a common problem which we all face when our normal life suddenly comes to a standstill giving us a mental shock. The situation gets worse when we see no solution of the problem and feel disappointed. For some of us the life takes a U turn and the people so used to walk on straight track especially the people those never faced any deviation from their routine path feel unable to face this situation.

The book I mentioned above describes all about such situations.  Amy says ‘take back your power, embrace change, face your fears, and train your brain for happiness and success and you are back to track’. We all have a hero within us. Actually where there is a will there is a way.

However, there is no shortcut for coming out of deep problems but one has to stop and think over the problems with a cool mind and then act accordingly. It is kind of a situation like one lost in a long dark tunnel but comes out of it by taking small steps touching the walls of tunnel. You know during those dark moments the hero inside us motivates us to take those mall steps which take us out of the problem.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/photographer-hero-camera-action-1436917/

It is not right for our society
March 23, 2017
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I don’t think this is acceptable anywhere in the world or in any society to participate in same sex activities, but people are doing it and having fun in their own way. They even have clubs where they gather to do it on mass scale. However, that is neither ethical nor healthy. Besides sexually transmitted diseases are also the gifts of relations like these.

Actually, this is common in every country and society but not openly, although many countries allow it legally, I am sure depressed people are the ones who are indulged in practices like these. However, not all have courage to accept it. Surveys on this subject reveal that in most countries there are substantial numbers of people who are involved in such relations without letting their partners knowing about it.

Of course, they can’t afford to be known as cheater once they were caught. In addition, no one can deny or there is anything secret about this fact. And here is where we should start to put some sense of connection between the real and imagined world but we have some uncomfortable resonances. Have you ever given it a thought that what if the rapes are anything but gratuitous? In my views all sexual violence is true reflection of what’s going on in our society.

It’s not that all countries prohibit such acts but it is not considered healthy and acceptable as a substitute of natural act. Neither it is the cultures nor not all cultures refrain people entering into such relations. In Islam, a man can marry many women as permitted in their culture. It is their culture and just because only a few practice it, it does not mean it has to be seen something quite negative.

I am not sure if many husbands would allow their wives unless they too feel the same way but I know some who would do it gladly and are also ready to involve in gay stuffs for the sake of experiments or have fun in their life before they turn serious and have an ordinary life.

I am sure some are just taking it likewise and having temporary fun. They may think in terms of giving up the act when their husbands return then perhaps they would come out of such relations. No matter how good is their partner, they would not let the partnership go; the fact is they can’t afford to continue it for the sake of their marriage. I would want to avoid her who thinks she can put more concentration to her lesbian partner thinking she would forget her while her husband comes back.

I do feel a bit strange for people involving into it, but once they do, it cannot be taken back suddenly. There are people who have had sex with more than one person. For example, they indulge in three or even those who make so-called orgies that allows them to involve in mass act of sexual activities.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/help-viewer-no-help-crowd-906885/

The love and hate relations
March 23, 2017
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I am in a mood to write something although I have nothing to write. However, it dawned on me suddenly reading after some big one thought that it does not take much to write a thought of the day. Yes, I have done that before also and it clicked too.

So here is the thought of this day – “Love me or hate me, both are in my favor…If you love me, I’ll always be in your heart…If you hate me, I’ll always be in your mind.”? William Shakespeare, he did not say the same words perhaps but that was what he meant.

It’s all about Love and hate relations but having posted this thought I remembered that the idea was about love and hate relation, so I gave it another though, you read me right, another thought to original thought and the final that emerged.

“Honestly, I don’t have time to hate people who hate me, because I’m too busy loving people who love me” I do not know who said it but whoever said it said it well.

You see even small things have a significant meaning hidden in which need our attention for example I would like to recite a story which describes human relations in a different way. In some cases the hatred is so intense that the love part of the relation is not visible even if love has 50% share in that particular story.

You know, in case of love and hate relations it looks or reflects exactly the same way as you wish to show it or define it. I think we should be always careful how we define the things and based on our belief or our love for them. We should avoid living in a world where we have to live in the state of terror.

Let me tell you another story of the balloon seller who used to sell his balloons to small children standing in a village market. Children would purchase and enjoy with those gas-filled balloons flying high in the air tied with thin threads. Balloons of all colors red, blue, green, white, yellow but not black.

Here is the story of the balloon seller

The balloon seller would release a balloon in the air for children to see from distance if he found his sale going down and children seeing the balloon would rush up to him to make things moving again.

One day a young kid asked the balloon seller about a black balloon if it would not fly because it was black! The balloon seller told the kid that it was not the color but the gas inside that made balloons to fly.

It is true for us as well; the way of our thinking keeps us positive or negative in life. Therefore, that is all about our thinking about life and its colors or the way we take our life, “It is all about our way of thinking that may take us to dizzy heights of life or push us down, it is there within us but we have to improve it.

Image source https://pixabay.com/en/black-brown-cambodia-girls-hands-1840197/

Go toward your goals and success
March 23, 2017
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Lifestyle consists of our daily habits, good and bad. Habits are what we constantly do or avoid doing so. Habits are not easy to change, but having purpose it is possible. For the assistance can be used even mobile gadgets. One of them – the gadget “Lift”. It is free app and it can be downloaded to any of your smart devices. You will be surprised how many people want the app beeps to remind them to clean their teeth in the morning and evening. Top five “Lift” users’ habits: they want to drink more water, more exercise, to read, to meditate and go to bed before midnight. Life cannot change during one day; we are slowly slowly approaching toward wished changes till these changes one day become the normal way of our life. It may be that decided to go for jogging in the morning, you will quickly get tired and the first rainy morning you will prefer to stay another half hour in bed.

However, when you will break the ice of laziness and being determined, it is likely the next morning you will run already easier.  And then will come a time when to put on the sportswear and run out will be the first reaction to the alarm ring.

Interestingly, personalities strongly oriented to the achievements often stumble with a view to long-term goals. Such people gain enough satisfaction in carrying out what is most important right now, although it is not so important to the future perspectives.

We can not to control everything around. But let’s try to set out environment so that it will minimize interference and help as much as possible. If your goal is to find a partner, do not wait until it falls from the sky. Just do something towards your goal, change things that interferes your wish.

 

Picture by Pixabay.com

Forget happiness, if you want to be happy
March 23, 2017
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Do you think that in order to be happy we have to chase happiness? I do not think so. In fact, people who too much focus on happiness are unhappy. Some people hang on to the idea of happiness, that it just let it through their hands. Waiting till comes this grand moment of euphoria, we miss happiness, which is close to us. Or, once tasted great joy, we are beginning to compare it with other events, and so decline it in value and taking away the positive emotions from ourselves.

Of course, the long-awaited raise in career does not match to typical your child’s performance in the concert, but properly evaluated this event also will give you pleasant sensations.

Some events are emotionally stronger than others, but that does not mean that we have to chase and wait for only those things that will give the greatest euphoria. All the pleasant moments are important, but we need to learn to observe it and enjoy. If all we would carry on the rule of happiness and measure all events, we would rarely experience positive emotions. Sometimes even 2 cm of happiness are much.

The chase of happiness is shallow, short-lived and hedonistic goal. Moreover, we not only reach it, but get the opposite result. People who prefer happiness feel lonelier than those who do not focus on it. Paradoxically, the greater importance we give to happiness, the unhappier we are.

I am not saying that wish to be happy is bad, but it is not the only area in which we should pay attention.  Happy life is like a matrix consisting of happy events, occasionally – sadness, sense perception, playfulness, psychological flexibility, autonomy, mastery and a sense of belonging. You should celebrate every win in any of these areas and too look beyond happiness. It will come when we least expect it.

 

Picture by Pixabay.com

The Story of a Desperate Teenager
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19 year old Marta was a desperate girl. She was desperate to be loved and have a good life and did for a while but it wasn’t easy. She wasn’t easy to deal with. She was suicidal and very sensitive to various things.

Marta dated a boy for 10 months and she was happy but she wasn’t exactly the best girlfriend. Marta was a extremely jealous girl and this affected the relationship. Her boyfriend couldn’t have any friends or best friends that were female because she would have major jealousy attacks. Not only this but she was extremely possessive. There wasn’t any shame at all, she couldn’t be in public with her boyfriend because she would be inappropriate in front of all their friends. They would have to tell them to basically “get a room”. It wasn’t exactly something you should be doing in public.

Because of this excessive jealousy and the way she was possessive the relationship started going downhill. Most of the days where just fights. Fights about stupid little things where she would do anything to control him. It was something out of this world. He loved her but had to hide that fact he was going out with friends that were female because she would make a huge scene.

A little through her life she discovered she was adopted. This made her go crazy. Her biological father killed her mother and she was put up for adoption. Now the thing here is she was adopted due to pity. Nothing else. This did not make things easier. Marta had been the kind of person to cut herself when she was down and she had try to kill herself in the past. This is not an easy person to deal with.

Down the road her boyfriend broke up with her. The way she was with him was getting exausting. He couldn’t do anything and that is no way to live life. He was a play boy before and after this relationship. They broke up and he decided to see other girls to get the pleasure he needed. It was a thoughtless thing. Little hook ups to manage what he wanted.

There was a problem here, she knew he was a very horny person and decided to play around by telling him that colorful friendship would be find. Sex and nothing other than sex.

He was warned by many that this was not going to end well. She was a desperate person, she was trying to get him back with what he loved the most. They even got back together for 1 week but it ended fast. She was the same. She disnt change.

This made her crazy and she decided to start write to all her friends and herself a suicide letter where it would point out “in other words” that it was the boyfriends fault when in fact it wasn’t. She just couldn’t deal. That night she went to the hopsital for drinking bleach. Family members caught her on time to pump her stomach before something horrible had happened. He was in pieces. She was going to do something awful but he couldn’t go back to her just because he didn’t want her to kill herself. It wouldn’t be fair to either one of them.

She started to lash out at his friends and call them whores and many other things. In the middle of all of this she started to turn into what she was calling the others.

He was already in the middle of a not official relationship and yet she wouldn’t stop stalking him and calling him but always bad mouthing the girl. It was something out of the ordinary. Something you see in movies.

On night out, the new couple decided to go out. Marta was not in her right mind and her friends didn’t help her either, but she saw them together and decided to try and offer sex to him with her there.

After a while she finally stopped with the calls but decided to post things directly for him. Yet she was the one already offering sex to everyong around. She became the liar who called other’s liar, the whore that called others whore and the one no one likes because she was pitied on.

She is moving on but she is broken and there is nothing that could fix her now.

The Life Of Poor Destitute, Orphaned Children
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Credit image share to slideshare.net ppt-on-women-child-welfare 30-728.jpg

Life can be cruel many a times to young children. The most comforting and safe place which is the parents are not there for them as either they are destitute or are orphans. They have nowhere to go or no place where they stay which they can call a home.  There are many reasons why children end up in these unfortunate situation. Either the parents of the child would have passed away due to some accident or they would have been dumped by the parents due to their sex and gender. One more reason the parents who are alive do this is because the child may be unwell and they have exhausted all the resources to take care of the child’s health issue and the household.

 

This makes them wash off their hands as they consider the child as difficult to manage financially. So here it is a case of hopelessness, poverty, health, financial problems and mental tensions a combination of all of these and others. This is a very complicated situation which many families and children undergo and children are the worst sufferers. Let us study different situations as to why such a thing takes place in the first place and how in some cases things have ended in  a fairy tale way and in most cases it is a road of life filled with thorns for the child.

 

In some cases when the mother of a child passes away the father would marry again and would get a new family in these cases the step mother treats the children whose mother is no more as a sort of a burden and while she takes care of her children either from the present marriage or the earlier one well these children are ill treated and mercilessly beaten. Unable to endure this torture the children whose mother has passed away runaway from the home and start living on the streets of cities and railway platforms.

 

The risk involved are they may come into contact with gangs who are involved in child trafficking. Once they are stuck in these people’s hands life becomes virtual hell for the children as they are told to beg, given less food, sometimes their hands and legs are broken or their eyes damaged so that they can earn more due to their appearance. They end up in this hell hole all through their life and can never escape the eyes and watch of their keepers who are ruthless. There is nothing called a ray of hope in the lives of these children.

 

In some cases the destitute, orphaned or runaway children are lucky enough not to fall into the hands of these child traffickers. But they end up rummaging the garbage dumps and collect the garbage like plastics, paper and metals etc. and sell the same in the evening to the wholesaler who will give them a fixed price for their daily collection. Such children stay near places like railway stations, huts, sleep opposite the shops on the pavements in the night and are again back to work in the morning with their bag.

 

Whenever some child welfare department people of the government approach and try to help them they run away as they are happy with their life and do not want to lose their freedom and their daily earnings which they earn. The age group of these children can be between 4 to 14 years some have to even take care of their brothers and sisters. Luckily there are some homes run by social welfare groups which allow these children to sleep in a safe place, give them food and clothes and the children do not want to stay there even if told they would be taken care off. The reason when asked is they like roaming around collecting garbage as they can see places and it fetches them money which can be used by them. Some of them are used to smoking too. These children are slowly tried to be weaned away from these habits.

 

In some other cases where the orphaned children are taken care of by distant relatives who themselves are not of a strong financial background. Due to the greed for money these people end up selling these agencies to placement agencies when they reach the age of around 12 to 16  sometimes even less than that. These placement agencies play a hefty price for those children to their relatives. The children are given false information that they are being taken to the city to be admitted in a very nice school where they can pursue their studies and become big in life.

 

Once they reach the city they are contracted to people who would want maids or servants by the placement agencies for a hefty annual price. Their they are made to do things which even elders find it difficult to do. The food served is very less and the punishment by the owners if something goes wrong is severe many a times their hands are broken and they are burnt too with hot rods. The most disgusting part is all these people who employ them have their own children and behave in this manner. They are aware of the laws and the consequences but still would do such illegal things.

 

These children’s life gets snuffed there itself as they will is broken and they resign themselves to such a fate for which they are in now way responsible.  In some cases things prove to be lucky as neighbors or others who see this inform the police and child welfare department and they are saved in the nick of the time. But many remain stuck in the quagmire for their entire life. Nowadays many citizens are reporting these cases and the perpetrators of the crime are getting caught and jailed which is a welcome change.

 

In some cases the child when still an infant lands in the house of a person due to fate and by circumstance when left alone or when roaming on the roads. At that time this person mostly  who  happens to be a woman picks her up and takes very good care of the child and feeds them well all there requirements are fulfilled  and they find there are similar other children in that place and they are in a happy mood. So the child reposes full trust on the woman and listens to what she tell them to do.

 

But one thing is observed that they are never sent to school to study and are taught fine arts like singing, dance and other crafts etc. Which they learn happily. Once they mature into young girls they are taken to parties where they are displayed and people who are the age of the child’s father or grand father are the ones who come seeking for such children. They too are introduced as some distant relative of the woman taking care of her and are taken to different places on tour which they thoroughly enjoy. Once their confidence is gained these people make the children who are mature to indulge in unwanted and despicable acts for which they are rewarded with materialistic things.

 

These children end up thinking that this is the life which one should live. What else is required we are getting good food, visiting good places, going on tours, being given expensive gifts and what not. What else would one want from life when life is so beautiful and colorful. Little do they know that they are being abused and what is being done to them is a crime. They feel they are on the right path as every who is with the woman is doing the same thing. These people do not have contact with the outside world and are always under the watchful eyes of the people appointed by the woman who takes care of them. It is a ironic and difficult things where instead of become ashamed on feels happy for what happens. As they have been taught things from their childhood that way. This is not limited to the girl child only but even boys are subject to this sort of treatment. This is a big worldwide industry which disgusting to say the least. The sooner the world cracks down on these cartels and syndicates the better it is for the whole world.

 

In a few other cases these children land up in the hands of  industries like cracker manufacturing, textile, garment, diamond polishing, woman’s accessories, bangles, brick kilns and other related industries. These industries are not the standard big companies but the ones in the rural villages and sometimes in the cities too which are not seen to exist in the registers of the labour department. Basically they are illegal fly by night operators. Here these young children are made to work for more than 16 to 18 hours a day in hazardous conditions. Food and facilities served to them are limited. They are used as bonded labour and shifted from one place to another to evade the eyes of the law. They face a very tough time till someone in the labour welfare department or some government official or some citizen who works for this cause comes to their rescue. The reason they are used is their hands are small and tiny compared to elders and are suitable for such a work. The amount to be paid to them is also less as wages. Whereas elderly people have to be paid as per law and they can defend and protect themselves compared to children.

 

There are a few lot of these poor destitute and orphaned children who land at the right place and at the time. As someone from the social welfare departments spots them or a member of child welfare stumbles upon them on the streets or the police, some government officials or some well meaning citizen of the country, NGO comes across them and takes them to a child rescue home where all food, education, accommodation and other skills are imparted to these children and they grow up into a good citizen and a human resource for the nation and are very proud to be serving the motherland in their jobs.

 

Many of these children work for the cause of saving their own kind who have not seen prosperity and are in the clutches of bad and crooked characters. They make it a mission of their life to work for this noble cause and change the lives of many like them for the better. Many such children are in very high ranking posts due to their capability, hard work, dedication. How nice would it be if we were able to track all these destitute and orphaned children before they get stuck in problems.