Spiritual Abuse

Spiritual Abuse is the culmination of Emotional, Intellectual, in the presence of Isolation.

Women who have been spiritually abused are virtual zombies. They are afraid to say or do anything that has not been authorised by their Owners.

In marriages;

the wife will say…”No!  You can’t sit there! That’s my Husband’s seat!” with ferocity.

the wife will nervously look around a restaurant as if she’s committing a crime;  “My husband said I shouldn’t be here…”

When he’s there she sits and waits as if an indentured slave. She responds as he determines.

She may be asked, “Would you like another cup?”  and as she says…”Yes…”  he says, “No, she’s had enough.”  And the wife will admit, “Yes, he’s right, I had enough.”

This zombie may have begun life as a vibrant and opinionated woman who was independent.  Now she has to ask if if she can go to the bathroom.

How does it happen?

It begins with Emotional Abuse, in which he can hurt her feelings with a glance.  To protect herself she tries not to ‘provoke’ him.

It continues into Intellectual abuse in which he knows everything and she is stupid.

While this is happening, he is isolating her from others so that he has the only input.

Bosses from Hell also attain the ability to spiritually abuse the employee.  This is beyond emotion, beyond thought.

When Boss smiles, everyone smiles.  When Boss is pleased everyone feels blessed.  But when Boss is angry it is like living through an Earthquake.

Husbands and Bosses get this power because it is given to them.

The wife loves the husband, he is the centre of her life.  The employee works for the Boss, he is her only means of money.

The wife needs the husband to love her, the employee needs to keep the job.

If the first time the husband made the wife cry, and she packed up and left, that ends the marriage.  If she goes back and he does it again, she knows she’s an idiot.  In most cases, it doesn’t happen again, but something else happens.

The first time the Boss tries his nastiness the employee quits, that ends it for all time.

So abusers have to be careful how they operate.   They must know that when they make their play they win.

By the time a relationship reaches to Spiritual Abuse, it is often too late.   The wife has been eroded to nothing, the husband can do what he wants.

Once this stage is passed Verbal abuse of the worse kind begins, and in most cases, physical abuse.

The oppressor has lost all respect for the victim.  He might have given her some deference when he began the emotional see saw, might have laboured to prove himself smarter, but when he can control her mood, when he can give or withhold happiness, she is no more than an object he can treat as he pleases.