Is it ok to have a friend that is the opposite sex when you are married or in a relationship?

In today’s society, many people feel that is ok to have a friend that is the opposite sex when you are in a relationship or married. I am one of those believers that do not agree on this matter. Some of our so-called friends, are involved in our churches, our place of employment or just someone that we grew up with. Some of us feel that everyone that we meet is a friend. I always had a problem when it came to figuring out who was really a friend. I realize that I have associates but not true friends.

Basically, I feel that when you are married or in a relationship, your significant other should be your best friend. That is supposed to be the person that you share things with personally. Relationships are not valued as much as it probably was in the modern times. Certain relationships were not accepted because they were considered an interracial couple that was usually snared at. Some of our grandparents were married for years before we came along because they valued their relationships and believed in their marriage vows….commitment, being devoted, being friends, etc.

When we come to the realization, to value what we have, in a relationship or marriage…you will then probably see that there is no true need to have other friendship with the opposite sex while being involved. Sometimes, there are couples that do not mind the extra curricular activities of having friends. Everyone has their own opinion when it comes to having friends while involved in a relationship or married.

Problems may occur in your marriage or relationship, when others are involved. It is basically on the actual couple if they are accepting terms of having friendships, with other people, while they are together. Jealousy might be a true factor…then turns to rage or anger. Jealousy plays a part with both male and females, when involved in relationships. Being untruthful is another factor….then turns to being a trust issue and causes doubt in the relationship.




  • Detra Abbass

    View Comments

    • Of course, if you love your partner and you trust each other, it's okay to have friends no matter the sex whether it's same sex or opposite.

    • That is true why make it a problem when friendship feeling is different from love to the one you love.

    • There are two relationships in this world that matter. Family and friends.

      Your spouse is in the "family". I take it you know who your friends are. Sometimes family can also be friends. A spouse is usually a BFF (best friend forever). But sometimes not. Nevertheless, just because you get married, that doesn't mean you can no longer have friends. However, if you have a friend of the opposite sex and YOU don't know where to draw the line? Then for the sake of your family, YOU need to steer clear of that "friend". Unless you want a broken marriage and an unhappy home.

      I think Prince Charles is an example of a man who thought his "friend" was more important than his "wife", who he probably never loved or never even considered a friend. Yes. I speak of the late Princess Diana, a woman who would probably still be alive today, if only her husband (that jerk they call a prince) had truly loved her.

    • For me, it is okey to have friends either you are married or in a relationship as long as you know your limitations. Remember, no man is an island we need to talk with someone in every aspect of our life lets say its like interacting with other people for the sake of solidarity and social meaning. Even if you already committed you still have the chance to enjoy the company of your so called friends like going out once in a while having some cup of coffee while talking anything under the sun, watching movies together just to have fun and spend quality time together. Having our circle of friends is a part of our social life but what most importantly is your family and you're so called significant other to have the best of time to spend your precious time with them, have some good time, and loving them in every minute of your life.

    • Me I don't see anything wrong with having friends when your in a relationship or in a marriage. I mean let me ask this question can we really survive without friends? I don't think so. For me its quite okay for people to have friends of the opposite sex even in marriages. When people get married they have made a bow and have made a promise to stick to their partners till death. But the thing is we are living in a world where people don't value marriage anymore. It has actually become a material venture for people who are looking forward to becoming rich in a short time. Anyway when you are making that bow to your spouse you know that you are there to stay and to be faithful. You cannot think of even going astray. And anyway you are a grown up you know what's right and what's wrong, if a fri3nd of yours approached you and asked for friendship, you better than anyone else knows that that is a very wrong thing to do. You should have self control and avoid situations that will get you into trouble. You cannot live without friends in the name of being faithful.what if something happened to you or your spouse God forbid who will you run to, wouldn't you run to your friend first? Think about it.

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