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What the man fits for long term relationship?

Often common situation that people are breaking up, again make peace, find another partner, then again break up and looking for a new partner and do it so often that it seems that the serious and long-term relationships are just rarity. So, what is the partner that is suitable for long relationship? What are the most important rules for long-term relationship?

In general, people call the relationship in two ways – long-term and short-term. In other words, it could be called a relationship with and without obligations. So, if a person is in a relationship for few years, but they are not binding or contain no common plans, constantly arise third parties, this relationship cannot be called long-term in the true sense of the words.

The right man for long-term relationship is one who is ready for obligations and in addition is sufficiently mature to understand the relation between illusion and reality in his life. Man is oriented to the future, seeking commonality with a partner, creates plans, and accepts obligations. Statistically, it is believed that women mature for a family creation earlier than men, it is determined by both physiological and psychological gender differences.

Awareness and maturity for long” relationship is revealed through the understanding that the essence of a relationship is a conscious choice. That is, when the initial butterflies get quiet and appear more real knowledge of each other, when a person deliberately tells himself that the presence with this particular partner is his choice. When the decision to be a relative is conscious, it protects from automatic actions and greater risks to destroy this relationship.

So the best feature for a long relationship with a specific person is the human consciousness and self-determination. In my view, any relationship is the question of needs and opportunities. This is identification of your basic desires, understanding weather your partner is able to meet them, and vice versa, if you have the necessary resources to meet the needs of your partner.


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The Best Reminders for Heartbreakers

In some point in our lives, we still need to be human in ending up a relationship. I am referring to heart breaker persona. It is in their personality to break the heart of people who loved them so dearly. These heartbreakers acted like an animal behavior. It may sound inappropriate but that’s the truth behind their mask.

There are times that they became so inhuman in ending up the romantic relationship and offer a platonic relationship instead. In some occasion, they forgot to be humans in dealing with the situation. As for a reminder sake, they should act appropriately for letting go a person.

For instance, if a person wanted to end up the romantic ties, he or she doesn’t show the decency of being carefree to break the heart of somebody. They seem not showing the care as acted before the breakup. As if they pushing them away deliberately. We get the point that this heart breaker lost his or her love to someone. But it doesn’t mean he or she needs to be cruel and inconsiderate with the feeling of others. They forget that someone is hurting just because the relationship failed along the process.

Some people don’t show the decency to say sorry for cheating their partners in life. It was like nothing happened and being cruel will be the last option of ending a relationship. That’s the sad part of loving someone who doesn’t care for hurting the trusted partner in the first place.

The best reminder for the heartbreaker is to know that they violated the golden rule of God. In time, bad karma will strike without noticing it. There is no why’s and but’s for that. It is the course of action strike back for the bad things done from the past. The realization will be the last thing to know about the fate happened to their lives. Forgiveness is hard to gain. It is not like a piece of cake that can complete the whole cake.

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How to Determine Failure in Relationship

Some people cannot determine the real cause of having a failure in a relationship. The main reason, they were so in love and cannot see the failure of a relationship coming into their lives. There are so many instances that relationship failures can be determined through personal experiences.

Here are the following signs that relationship is boiling into hard rocky road:

  1. Incomprehensible Alibis: There is some point that your partner created so many alibis. It is not only a pure alibi and it does appear white lies too. Thus the excuses are so lame and it is comprehensible in so many ways.
  2. Night Out with Friends: For some reason, the sudden night out came to the picture. It is unusual for the partner to socialize while in a relationship. We can take note that he or she is mingling in a new crowd.
  3. Unplanned Travel: After the hard work during weekdays, you might notice that your partner is planning to travel without somebody else. It wasn’t the case. You are not a part of his or her travel.
  4. Exercises Without the Partner: There are times that your partner will suddenly change his or her routine on daily basis. He or she became a member of certain gym club and you did not belong to the group.
  5. Changing Schedules of Appointment: In some point, the usual routine of being together had changed gradually. At the end, you will notice that special dates with the partner are gone due to changes in appointments at the workplace.
  6. Less Interaction: Your partner started to become passive and never gives an opinionated statement on certain topics. It will become a frustration since you cannot get the constructive criticism in finding an answer to certain dilemmas encountered.
  7. Keeping in Silence: In reference in no. 6, your partner remained in silence while you are convincing yourself that he or she is agreeing. But it wasn’t always the ideal approval from a partner.
  8. Showing Disinterest to Any Suggestions: In every suggestion, you may give, he or she is starting to blocked suggestions. He or she is starting to become irrational in every decision. He or she is starting to push you away in his or her life.

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How to maintain a relationship?

It is said that these days, we are used to throw away the relationship we do not need any more just as unnecessary things. The older people are used the faulty item to repair, rather than throw away. It seems that sometimes it is enough just a few things to successfully keep the spark. Make it a habit strive for your well-being and your marriage.

Do not stop going on a date. This lesson is very old, but it always works. Then, when you stop go on a date with your spouse, a part of the magic disappears. Therefore, invite each other out on dates, regardless of whether they are spontaneous or planned – it will help you to keep the romance!

Details are not worthy of the fracas. Sometimes you irritate said words or certain actions and you want to explode in anger. But behave in this way, just think whether it worth to get anger. Sometimes are better for both to breath deep and think does the stupid annoyance really has to be a cause of anger.

The problem will not disappear without speaking. There will be a variety of silly problems in marriage that not worth your anger, but also there will be such problems that need to be expressed. Without communication, the problem can increase to such level that it would be too big to deal with it.

Perform home chores together or exchanging one another. Change the roles and share the marital obligations in that neither one of you does not become dissatisfied with the monotony.

To start and finish your day with your beloved is a luxurious life, which should not be taken as a matter of course. Unfortunately, we will never know how much time we have devoted to be together, so develop the perception that each day begins and ends with the one you love.

In the life routine spouses sometimes forget why married to each other. When it becomes difficult, it is important to remember all the best features for which you chose your beloved.


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Reasons why women so love bad boys.

True and caring men complain that loved women leave them for true scoundrels – bad guys. Of course, complaints are greatly exaggerated, but there is a mote of truth in these unpleasant words. You do not believe? Here are a science-based evidence.

Women are attracted to men who feel more important and superior to the others, demonstrating arrogant behavior and seeking to exploit others. Unfortunately, often such men attract women, but not because of their personal qualities, but because of the fact that they pay more attention to appearance. Such men spend more time at the gym and care how their body looks. In the short term, these people seem to women more cheerful and more pleasant, but they are difficult to keep a positive image, and, at the same time it is hard to maintain long term relationship with them.

The researchers said that women who feel more vulnerable and feel the threat of the public (even if being a child had very painful experiences) choose physically stronger, dominant males. Therefore, with a view to a potential security, women tend towards the bad guys, even if they will not be able to defend them.

Bad guys are most suitable for short-term relationship. As already mentioned above, such men are not suitable for long-term commitments, so they prefer women looking for short love affair. However, dating with the bad guys, women feel that sooner or later all this will end, in addition, they seem to be ready for fun and adventure. The fear of commitment is nothing wrong, and in some stages of life even normal, but women should not blame the all men gender for the breakup of relationship.

Research shows that, regardless of culture, men are far more bad guys than women bad girls. As a result, we can blame the  masculinity cult that forces constantly compete and prove their worth, to hide emotions, weakness, the wish not to attach to anyone etc. Therefore, there are much more bad boys in the and women finally get attached to them.


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Humble Beginnings of the Family

When I was a child, I had seen my father’s family turned to be somebody or someone in the society. It was a humble beginning. It was past form of situation. Because they had changed into the other side of being a person. They had developed the greediness from within. It was a picture of breaking the family apart. It was an old pattern that family can never be the same again because of inheritance.

I thought it will not happen to have a broken family. As the years go by, my father siblings had changed and tried to pull my family down. My late father taught us to stay together despite money is involved. It doesn’t measure the importance of a family. That’s the reason why we always help each other and never put the money at the center of the relationship.

I am not sure if when will it happen in cutting the relationship with my father’s family. They are planning to sell the family house. My late father fought hard to stop them. But my father is not here anymore and cannot able to fight for his family.  Now, we need to face the challenge. Once the payment of my father’s share will be given to us. We decided to cut the relationship with his family.

There are no reasons that we keep on clinging to them anymore. In the first place, they decided us to be out of the family. We are anticipating to find our own house and live as a close-knit family. Our life will not depend on them. It is how we are going to re-build our own home. It is also the time to forget the bloodline between my immediate family and them. It is a typical way to face the fate of the family because of greediness.

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Why Assumptions Should Not be Taken Seriously

I think many of us assume a lot of things bad about this world. And it can drain us really bad if we don’t keep check on what we assume. Because assumption has the power to destroy our life. These days I am going through the phase of anger. And this has made me assumptions on many counts. And there is very little I can do about it. It seems the rage on many small things has led me to worry more relax less. So this sort of thinking surely has it’s set of issues. You can see that when people are thinking about what things went wrong we have to also check what assumptions we did on our side of the life. I think that surely has it’s set of issues. In this article I want to discuss why assuming can be wrong and why you have to be careful with what you feed in your mind.

Losing Friends

I think when we assume too much we start to lose the friends. And with time friends don’t stay with us with our assumptions. We have to take life one at a time. Instead of assuming and anticipating about the friends, you get into more trouble. Losing friends is not a bad feeling if all of them were bad. I think you have to understand that some of the time, you just need to take break from all of this. You can’t make bad choices when friends leave you because you need to focus on your current set of choices instead of past assumptions. That’s how you get back to new friends.

Losing Family

I think family acts like they are around when we think of it this way. In reality, I think family sticks around for their own benefits. And they don’t pay attention to us when we make so many assumptions. You have to consider family by keeping your ego aside. And also focus on what you can do with your actions. I think many of us don;t pay attention to family. And this sort of stuff grows over a period of time. I don’t want to say that we all should be careful with what we say, but in case of family I think sometimes we have to take few steps back. And that is how we end up being in a better place.


Another hard thing that may happen is the recovery. You can’t really recover from the habit of making assumption. You have to consider life in a much better way. You have to avoid thinking about the assumptions. I think this is the hardest part for anyone who is trying to be good in the eyes of people. Because some of the time you have to do good and recover. You can’t just do things the other way. Recovery is not an easy task. And you have to understand where you fall in such case. My personal observation is that recovery is the phase where most of us are going to struggle.

So as you can see it is not going to be any easy when it comes to dealing with the life issues. So take one day at a time.

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How Often Is Seldom In Your Relationship That Turns You Off?
April 21, 2017

When you enter into a relationship, make sure that you already have the idea about it. It is not only the feeling called love you know and understand. There are more you ought to learn from others experiences, from your parents, friends and through reading. It is from them where you can have the complete adjustment should there be a turmoil that may attack your peaceful situation. The cause of conflict may not all the time derive from the dislikeness of your parents towards the opposite sex, but rather within the relationship itself. Expect something shaky someday in your relationship for there is no perfection without something to resolve for conflict is the source of total destruction should you and your bf – gf does not adjust his / her pride. There are times in your life that you cannot avoid fighting in words. The main cause of such fight is jealousy. Jealousy is number 1 enemy in a relationship. There are boyfriends-girlfriends that feel jealous without basis and no ears to like to listen to the explanation and what is felt is the raging anger and wanting to end the relationship. That is so unfair decision unless proven true.

Somehow too much tolerance and understanding of the actions of your love can be unbearable anymore and such would be the ground for breakup. How you wish both of you to be together during a very important occasion like attending a wedding of a relative for you want to introduce your boyfriend- girlfriend to your siblings, yet the invitation is turned down for some explanations that seem a lie too shallow reason to believe. At first, you feel hurt for being rejected and as the scenario is repeated, the next time around you no longer invite your boyfriend or girlfriend. There might be another instance where you want your boyfriend or girlfriend to be with you like attending your sister or brother’s graduation day. That is one function of someone in a relationship to be with your love for you never want her or him to be hurt and lonely being alone especially if you are that free to go, yet you refuse because of many explanations. No matter how you explain the other party never likes to believe you. The mind of your love runs away from you and sooner or later you may want to break your relationship for there seems no other in your life except yourself.

I want to share you my own example of this one time I invited my boyfriend to have lunch together, but he refused because he told me his dad called him to have lunch with him in their home.I feel no guilt from him at all believing it was justifiable refusal only to discover his lie. Then I ate alone in a fast food near my work place. My mind told me to stand up and to cross the road only to see my boyfriend with another lady and the painful one is I saw him carrying the umbrella of the girl to shed her from the hot sun. My heart that moment was squeezed with so much pain for that lady was my neighbor and classmate during college. The guy never knew about what I discovered. I ignored what I have learned from him but I was not anymore happy to be with his company. There were so many lies that he told me and I was not anymore affected with those for I only had waited for the right time to totally dismiss him in my life. That big lie that turned me 100% off was when I saw them kissing in a dark classroom for there was a sudden blackout. Our school guard met me in the lobby near my classroom with some students that lighted my path with their cellular phones’ light and guard told me he saw two people in dark classroom. Many students left when it was announced by the school head guard that all classes that evening were suspended due to sudden blackout. I told the guard to call those two people to leave the area, but he was ignored. He said those might be my students; I went straight to the room and to my surprise lights went back and oh my God my eyes declared the evidence of my boyfriend’s betrayal. I caught them kissing. My students looked at me for they knew he was my boyfriend also my co-teacher. They turned away to avoid my presence. The next day, I reported them to the school administration with a ground of moral ethics and immediately they were removed from school. They became jobless and I was not anymore feeling the pain for I already had told my heart to feel like a stone. That was an incredible talk of our campus between students and teachers. Betrayal does not end like heaven but hell.

Despite the world is stormed with many cheaters, but they are most of the time honest and faithful to their love of life. Those who are not lucky in love like me, let us not give up who knows someday great love may come across our way without our expectation that he or she will be the final one. I do not know if you agree with destiny for many believe that destiny is what we make it, but the best way is help the self to be strong and change something that may be the cause of an easy betrayal of our love of life, that is, our too much trust. Too much trust to our love of life may be abused, instead of cherishing and giving value to our caring and thoughtful ways. They are truly having crooked mind and distorted feeling for they never care our feeling and never feel what true love is. Do not cry over spilled milk for it can never become one again. Let the spilled milk spread to the ground and let the worms or ants licked them until everything perished in our sight and never feel the pain again.

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Do people in your family look alike?

In every family, some siblings do look like and it shows the resemblance of their parents to them. It depends on how strong the parents’ chromosomes. Others don’t even look alike. The reason is it could be recessive traits from the blood line of grandparents. I think it would not be nice if the siblings will appear the same facial features with the exemption of identical twins.

My siblings and I are so unique in physical appearance. We don’t look alike that much. It wasn’t the case for children different fathers. At least, the mother’s chromosomes prevail in their veins. The family as a whole, we are considered to be a nuclear familial relationship. In my father side, they are 9 siblings in total. It was like having a village when the family has a reunion.

For some occasions, some children don’t look alike. But then, there are some instances that the father is skeptical if the child is his. That’s a ridiculous thing to think. This can happen if the father is working abroad and came back home with the wife having a new baby in the family. Perhaps the relationship was in trouble and unluckily, the wife impregnated prior the husband went to work abroad.

“How to solve this doubt of a husband?” It might be ridiculous for a guy to ask for a DNA test. But then, this is the last option to redeem the name of the wife to the people. Since it cannot be controlled that neighbors will make fussy over such situation, DNA testing is the best option to prove that the wife is faithful all along the relationship.

If this situation had been done, we can be sure that the relationship will not last. The trust was broken and insulting to a woman. There is no way can be patched up if things went sour and bitterness for some.

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Do you like the smell of freshly cut green grass?

In it summer in the Philippines, the local people were so busy doing some activities in their backyard. Cutting the green grasses would be ideal to make the place so peaceful to look at. This is what makes me feel so refreshing and I like the smell of cut green grasses. It is a scent that the residents love to smell.

When I was a child, I loved to help out in the backyard. I used to cut the grasses and let them dried. In the afternoon, I will burn them up. However, as the years go by. There is an ordinance from the city hall that burning things are not allowed now. Thus, we tend to pound the grasses and serves as fertilizer.

My siblings and I love to play in the backyard. When the grasses were cleared out, we can able to have a picnic. It wasn’t grandeur picnic. We buy some snacks in a store and have some lemonade. My father installed a tent too. It was a simple outdoor activity. And children can’t do nowadays.

Most children have their gadgets and even cannot go out. Now, as grown up, I am asking my youngest brother to cut grasses this weekend. We need to prepare for the coming of the new generation to have their summer vacation with us. More tents to be installed and have a bonfire at night. I hope to see my cousins and have the bonding moment as we used to be.

There are so many memories that will be treasured staying in our family house. Sooner or later, we cannot able to do it again. My father’s siblings are planning to sell it. As the old issue, inheritance makes the family circle in chaos. My family and I were planning to move out and find a new house to stay. Hopefully, there are some grasses that will be cut and remember the familiar smell of it.

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