My massage therapist came to our home one day, and she had swollen eyes after crying. I asked her what happened and she said she took her husband to a drug rehabilitation facility to have him “detoxified” of illegal drugs.
They have four children, the eldest was 12 years old, and the youngest, four months baby. She asked the local authorities to take her husband for rehabilitation after he threatened to kill their neighbor with a bolo (a big knife), when he got drunk with liquor. Her husband chased the neighbor trying to hack him.
He had the history of being addicted to shabu or methamphetamine hydrochloride, a banned drug. It was the reason she separated from her husband some years ago.He also threatened to hack her with a bolo during one of their altercations.
But last year, the husband came to her and swore that he had renewed and never use illegal drugs again. He made a lot of promises like finding a good job to provide for their children. He is a carpenter. She was swayed and she believed that her husband had stayed away from illegal drugs. They lived together for some months until she got pregnant with their fourth child (the four-months-old baby).
I almost blamed her for having her husband back in their home, but I did not do it.I told her that maybe her husband lied to her when he said he is not taking illegal drugs. I just advised her to be strong for their children. Now she is the lone breadwinner, because the husband will be confined at the rehabilitation facility for six months.
I do not know if she will reconcile again with her husband. I wish she would not, because I doubt if he will totally refrain from taking illegal drugs again.
My friend should learn her lesson well. She could support her family alone if she could find regular clients because she is a licensed massage therapist. I told her I will help her find clients.
Do you think she should reconcile with her husband again?
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This is a recurring problem worldwide of drug abuse and misuse and taking banned substances. It is very difficult to control such people as the drug abuse has taken total control of them they need help. According to me the husband may have had the right intentions when he told her what he told or he also may not have had any such intentions. But in my view the first one seems true because when they are not under the control or influence of drugs they are find and mean well. This is the same with alcohol too.
While it is a bad situation for the therapist. Since she has taken the task and put her husband in a rehab she has done her basic duty. Now it is for her to decide what she would want to do. As she would be knowing the case better. In my view she and the children should stay with her husband only after the complete recovery till that time maybe she can keep contact. Once recovery is done she has to take a undertaking of the family's safety and see that he is working at a place from where he cannot go out and again do drugs. The money should also be given to her if he means well for the family.
Maybe you are right that she should reconcile after he got reformed. However, in his kind of work, a carpenter, there could be so many temptations to drink liquor or take illegal drugs again. It is his self-control that would be in question.
He also have to avoid bad companions, but in his kind of work, he might not be able to do it because he cannot choose whoever he wanted to be with.
@acelawrite ,
In my opinion, she should not take back her husband anymore, even if he has been rehabilitated. Once an addict, always an addict, although there are cases of drug addicts who really was washed of the drugs. But maybe those are the cases wherein the addiction isn't that deep yet.
She has been threatened to be killed by her husband, why should she risk her life again by taking her back. She's better off without her husband, even if it means doing all what she can to provide for her children. God will help her. She just have to do what she has to do and ask God to help her.