Strategies To Deal With the Worst Boss

The worst employers often have mental problems.   They use the office as a place to act out their fantasies and neurosis.

Those with Inferiority Complexes have their photos and awards, no matter how ridiculous all over the walls. This is true of Narcissists as well.

These people have the mentality of Dictators who need to oppress everyone in their ambit.   The office is their version of their totalitarian state.

Interestingly, various psychological tests have revealed that Psychopaths are successful businessmen.  This may be based on the ‘murder’ of their competitors, the abuse of employees is enough to prevent them from becoming serial killers

If you think you are working for a Psychopath, you are probably correct.

Strategies to Use When You can’t Quit…

When you can’t just quit now, you have to put up what is flung at you.  Just as you can’t control the weather or your car doesn’t start you have to deal with it.

When you work for a Boss From HellYou have to learn to know what you can’t control and what you can. The major thing you can control is YOU.

That is, your feelings, your attitude, your reactions.

Once you admit that you are working for a mentally ill evil monster it all falls into place. You don’t need to analyse why,  search for reasons, you accept the fact. this is a psychopath.

What probably provokes a lot distress is finding yourself in a illogical and offensive environment.  When you accept this is nothing but a psycho-drama from a twisted brain, you lose a lot of stress.   You can lose more if you readjust your perception of real/normal/sensible when it comes to your office.

The Readjustment

Do Google on psychopaths.   You’ll see your boss.   Now develop strategies which do not only protect you, but reset your entire work environment to lounging in a spa.

Although it seems completely impossible and absolutely impossible in the hell you occupy, it isn’t.

The first thing you do is reassess your job.   Understand that none of this is your work.  All of this is his work. And the work is not as important to him as oppressing his workers.  The work is NOT important. Oppressing you is important.

There is a difference.   He is not assigning you this killing bundle of work because he wants it done.  He is doing it to oppress you.   What’s the difference?   The difference is that you don’t do the work.  You take one file or one aspect of the work.  That is all you do.   And you take All Day to do it.

He will insult you whether you are the best in your field or the worst.   The key word is ‘insult’.   That is important.   If you do a file perfectly in an hour, he will find fault because he needs to berate you.  He will have you do perfect work over, make it imperfect, than have you do it again.

So why are you killing yourself?

Do a shoulder shrug job and take all day to do it.   So he can insult you for taking all day to do a shoulder shrug job.

You get it?

Slacking Off

When people are forced to work on weekends or overtime, not because it is really required but because the Boss needs to express his ‘ownership’ of his ‘slaves’  there are ways to play it.

Many people will  surf the Net, enjoy the T.V.,  make phone calls.  And, many will often run a private business during those hours.

If you don’t want to work overtime find excuses.   Get sick, pretend to get an emergency call,  do something to get out of the office.

Don’t Care

Don’t take the work personally.   It is his work and doesn’t matter.    Waste time.   And do what he says as he says.  Don’t correct him.   Do the work wrong.  If he thinks   2+2 = 5, don’t correct him.

If he is a micro-manager who vets every keystroke you will do substantially less work than if  he was dead.

Doing less work is always good for you.

If you can type a letters in  ten minutes, make it take thirty.   Work slow and slower.   Make silly mistakes (deliberately) so the document takes extra long, wastes extra paper.

Making silly mistakes gives him the chance to insult you.   This is good. Ten minutes of insult means ten minutes of no work.

You slow down even more and when he jumps in your face for that say that you are trying not to make mistakes.

Time

Arrive on time and leave on time.  No Matter what.   Provoke him to waste day. If he demands you perform useless tasks, as long as you’re getting paid, why grouse? Take it for comic relief.

Do not fret about being unproductive, do not think, “I have so much work to do!” You have no work.  He has work. If the work piles up until the company has to rent another premises to hold it, so what?

And waste time.

Arrive, take ‘forever’ to set up, then go to the bathroom, then return.   You should easily catch thirty non-work minutes.

Work slow, dawdle, take a break.    Disappear for you lunch hour for that one blessed hour.  Return.  Take your usual thirty minutes or so to look busy but doing nothing, and remember, thirty minutes before quiting you start to close down.    And you take your time.

Disengage

Separate your mind from the work, from your boss. Stop caring.  What is important is  how late can you arrive without penalty?   How early can you leave.   This is important.  The Work is not.

Steal as much time as you can, working to make that eight hour day slightly over six.

Enjoy the Internet if you can, looking out the window, organising your desk,  talking on the phone whatever does not bring your mind to this building, to this job.

Take Control of Yourself

You are pat of a ‘fantasy world’ created by your psychopathic boss.  Develop strategies to turn stress into relaxation and  use his tools against him.

Recreate the job  to cut out his incursions into your head.  Become not merely proactive, take control.  Know what you are going to do, and how to control him.

Many of the worst bosses want you to work late or on off days. You don’t.    Have people call you ten minutes before quitting with an emergency.

Get someone to pick you up.

When he demands you work late, say, “I can’t.” He can not legally fire you for not working late. If he does, you have a lawsuit.

If you are a parent say, “I have to pick up my daughter at school.”

Most Bosses from Hell spring late work on you a few minutes before you are about to leave. “I can’t,” you reply. Don’t get into an argument.

Other Tricks

Get a work cell phone.   Turn it on just before you are to leave for work and turn it off when you leave the office. If you only have one phone, do not answer it when you are not in the office or on your way.   Let him leave a message.

Shut off your cell phone.  This prevents late night/early morning calls as well as those weekend ones.

When he jumps up about why you didn’t answer the phone, say you shut it off.

He’s very good at lectures.  A long insulting diatribe is his usual.  Say nothing. He is talking to hear his voice, not to impart information.

Keep reminding yourself that your boss is mentally ill and has has personal issues. Don’t listen.   Think of what you will eat for dinner, or how you will perform some domestic task.

Don’t listen. Let his words flow like sewage.

He’ll get more abusive when you don’t turn into jello, but as most of these people have bad hearts if he goes on long enough, he’ll suffer, not you.