One needs to know what marriage is before delving into the above subject. What is Marriage? The Encyclopedia Britannica defines marriage as “a physical, legal and moral union between man and woman in complete community life for the establishment of a family.” Horton and Hunt wrote that “Marriage is the approved social pattern whereby two or more persons establish a family.” Ahamefule Ekechukwu wrote that “Marriage is the formal union of a man and a woman as husband and wife, the mutual offering of sweethearts to themselves” H.M. Johnson, in his book opined that “Marriage is a stable relationship in which a man and a woman are socially permitted without loss of standing in community to have children”. A normal marriage exists between matured, knowledgeable man and woman as partners in the relationship.
During courtship, some husbands tease and lure girls into marriage. Many girls are given initial gifts and promises to enable them agree to get married to their husbands. What some girls see and hear from their suitors who later become husbands later change with time as time and life rolls on when the marriage is consummated. Following the world continuous economic meltdown, it becomes clear that a married woman cannot get all her needs from her husband. It than becomes clear that a girl should have a job before marriage. The following are the reasons why girls should have a job before marriage.
1. She is respected in her new home.
A girl who is working before marriage has respect in her new home. Her husband respects her. In the morning she dresses as her husband dresses to work. Her children and her husband’s relations will be proud of her. She cannot be seen as a sit at home dummy.
2. She contributes to family challenges.
The fact that a girl is working before marriage; in her new home she becomes a contributor indeed. This is because she contributes money and her opinions are respected. Her husband cherishes her because the whole burden of fending for the family is shared no matter how little the woman contributes.
3. She will not be a liability to her husband.
The girl who marries with a job is not a liability to her husband. Liability means “a condition of being liable, an obligation, debt or responsibility owed to someone”. A husband should not be totally under obligation to take care of all that concerns a wife. The real meaning of marriage is a relationship between two matured adults who are able to stand out, mutually helping each other and fending for themselves. Marital relationship should not be a one sided affair when it comes to release of money for family needs. A husband should not see his wife’s issues as a debt he must pay. Some married women see themselves as debts for their husbands to pay. Liability also means “a handicap that holds one back”. A married woman should not be “a setback” for her husband. She should not depend solely on her husband for everything she needs.
4. Self confidence:
A girl with job before marriage is confident that even if her husband does not give her money, she can raise it from her job. She takes care of herself when her husband has no money to give her.
5. Freedom from unnecessary control:
A girl with job before marriage has freedom to enjoy whatever she wants in her husband’s house. She can buy clothes for herself. She can eat whatsoever she wants to eat. There is nothing like waiting for her husband to dictate for her. The reasons why some men create unnecessary control for their wives is when a married woman cannot even look after herself. The husband tends to hoard some money to meet up with more pressing needs of the family.
It now becomes clear that a girl should have a job before she marries, otherwise she will be facing so many obstacles in the free flow of her life and the marital relationship which she is suppose to enjoy.Do you have more points? Please add in the comment section.
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I disagree. The “five reasons” you mentioned are possible to achieve with or without having a job before marriage. When the virtuous woman is described in the proverbs of King Solomon, there is no indication that the woman had a job before she got married. Although since it was Bible times, it's very likely she didn't have a job.
I do think that the role of a woman is not limited to their capabilities. For professional women, it is most likely to have a job right after graduating in particular major in university. During the old days, women seem to be confined at home and be submissive to their partners. Now, gender equality can be seen and people are trying to advocate such equal rights. On the other hand, there are some countries are not open to such changes. Women are still inferior position in the society.
Yes, that is very true.
As a career woman in my single days, I help my parents by buying groceries for the necessities at home. I also buy half sack of rice every month for our whole month consumption at home.
And since I have my own money, I can always go out with friends without asking for money from my parents. I can buy clothes , shoes and bags whenever I like.
So, when I got married, I was able to help my husband in providing for our sustenance and for our child.
I think, girls should really be financially stable also, before getting married.
I agree it is good for any woman to have a career. Nobody knows what kind of hand life will deal them and the possibility of two incomes is helpful for any marriage, but I was a stay at home mum and I can tell you that was in itself a job and deserved as much respect as any outside job I had. These days BOTH man and wife should work, contribute to the marriage and the things that make up a home. That means that respect is mutual and the man also does the housework.