Do you know how to maintain your health when caring for sick love once?????

Taking care of a sick loved one can put stress on your health. It can be draining emotionally, causing you stress that can make your health deteriorate. Similarly, you may neglect your own physical needs in your desire to take care of the other person. You may find that your own health is failing as you try to care for your loved ones, and if you’re health fails, you won’t be able to help. Therefore, it’s important to take care of yourself. If you fall ill, that does not do anyone any good. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help, as that can help take some of the burden off of you.

Part One of Three:
Taking Care of Your Emotional and Social Needs
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1
Consider what is stopping you from caring for your own needs. Culturally, it’s more acceptable to put the needs of others first. However, when it comes to being a caregiver, sometimes you need to take care of yourself. Part of that is figuring out what is stopping you from caring for yourself.[1]
For instance, you may feel selfish for putting your needs first. However, if you make yourself sick, what good will that do for the person you’re caring for?
Maybe you have trouble asking for help, meaning you take on the full burden of caring for the person. However, everyone needs some help when it comes to caregiving, so don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.
Give yourself permission to put your needs first at times, so you can be helpful to your loved one.

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Work through your feelings. Everyone has a range of emotions when it comes to caring for a loved one. Guilt, remorse, grief, resentment, anger, and anxiety are all common emotions, and it’s important to acknowledge and accept those feelings.[2] It’s also a good idea to find someone you can talk to about them, who’s willing to listen to what you’re going through without judgment.[3]
Consider seeing a therapist with whom you can process the emotional toll of caregiving.

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Find others in the same situation. Reach out to other caregivers, such as in a caregiver support group. Just listening to others’ stories and telling your own can make you feel better. You’re not alone in this situation. Others are going through it, too, and they can help support you through it.[4]
If you don’t have time to go to an in-person group, consider finding one online. You can check in whenever you have the time.[5]

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Take care of your spiritual side as needed. If you usually have an active spiritual life, try to nurture that side through prayer, meditation, or whatever you like to do. Generally, if you neglect a spiritual practice you normally do, it can make you feel unbalanced or out-of-sorts.
If you don’t pray or meditate, consider taking a few moments out of each day for yourself, just to sit quietly or even write in a journal, so you get in touch with how you are feeling.[6]
Find a way to relax. You need to take a bit of time each day doing something you enjoy that relaxes you. Doing so will help you maintain your sanity and health. Plus, if you’re more relaxed, you’ll make a better caregiver. Just find something small that you enjoy, and try to incorporate it into your day.[7]
Maybe your break could be a short walk outdoors or a few minutes spent doodling.[8]

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Spend some time with people you enjoy. Sometimes, you just need to hang out with your friends and have a good laugh. If you can, try to take a break to go out with your friends or family. You’ll be able to feel more like yourself, instead of just a perpetual caregiver.[9]
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Part Two of Three:
Taking Care of Yourself Physically
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1
Set limits. Only you know how much of your time and yourself you can give to caregiving. That means it’s important for you to set limits with yourself. You also need to express those limits with doctors, nurses, and other caregivers, so they’re aware of when you will and when you won’t be there.[10]

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Eat well. In a time when things seem out of control, you may neglect to focus on good eating habits. You may not eat much, or you may end up eating junk food. Both of those put a strain on you. Try to eat as healthy as you can, even if you have to order food in sometimes or rely on simple meals like salads.[11]
Remember to include lean proteins, whole grains, fruits, and veggies in your diet.

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Try to get enough sleep. Sleep can also be difficult when you’re caring for a loved one. You may be too worried to sleep at times, or the task of caregiving may interrupt your sleep. However, try to get as much as you can, aiming for a regular 7 to 9 hours a day, even if you have to do it in smaller chunks. Not getting enough sleep can put a strain on your health, plus it will make you less effective as a caregiver.[12]

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Take time to exercise. Exercising will also help you maintain your health while you’re caring for a loved one. As an added bonus, it can reduce your stress level. However, it can be difficult when you are caregiving, so you’ll need to find ways to work it into your schedule.[13]
For instance, maybe you can take a short walk a couple of times a day. You could also do yoga at home or try jumping rope.
You could also ask someone to come sit with your loved one while you take an hour or so to go exercise. That way, you get a much-needed break, plus the exercise you need.
Don’t neglect signs of illness in yourself. It can be easy to overlook signs of health problems in yourself when you’re caring for someone else. However, if you become sick, you won’t be able to help your loved one, so it’s best to stay on top of health problems. In fact, the best plan is to maintain your regular doctor’s visits and dental checkups to make sure you’re in good health.[14]
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Part Three of Three:
Getting Help
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Figure out what your loved one needs. Before you can ask for help caring for a loved one, you need to figure out where others can plug in. Take some time to list everything that needs to be done to care for your loved one. Try not to leave anything out.[15]
After you make the list, think carefully about what you can realistically do on your own without burning out. Now, look at what others could do to take the burden off of you.

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Ask people for help. Remember that you cannot do it all. It is okay to ask for help. Most of the time, people want to help in whatever way they can. However, they may need help figuring out what you and your loved one need. Talk to each person (friends and family) individually to help get your needs covered.[16]
You could say, “I know you care about Jane. I was wondering if you’d be able to help out a bit. I could really use someone to bring dinner some nights.”
Try to offer a task to the person that fits with their skills. Alternatively, ask them what they’d like to do to help, especially if they offer.

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Get professional help. If your loved one has a long-term serious illness, professional help is often needed. Respite care is a great option for getting help and giving yourself a break from time to time. Maybe your loved one needs to be in a long-term care facility or spend time at an adult daycare a few days per week that has the capability of providing care for your loved one.[17] Maybe you will keep your loved one at home, but you’ll need to hire help to come over and provide some care for your loved one. Either way, having a professional around can help take some of the burden off of you.[18]
Some communities offer volunteer respite care workers who can come and care for your loved one for a few hours so that you can take a break. You can learn more about respite care for older adults through your local Area Agency on Aging.[19]
When considering professional help, you may need to do some persuading when it comes to your loved one. That is, some people don’t like the idea of having outside help. However, most people will concede when they realize that you can’t do everything yourself. If your loved one is particularly against the idea, you may need to have someone who’s been in the same situation (as a caregiver or a professional) come talk to the person.
When deciding who to hire, first look at the kind of care you need help with. For instance, you may need non-medical assistance, to provide things like bathroom assistance and even things like cooking and cleaning. Medical care, such as home healthcare, helps with things like providing medications and need to be ordered by a doctor.
Some in-home health may be covered by programs like Medicare. Make sure you ask what your insurance covers when looking for professional help.
If your loved one is suffering from a terminal illness, hospice may be a good option for you, which can provide care for your loved one, if he or she has 6 months or less to live.
Look at free options for care. Many community services provide some type of care for people who are ill, particularly if they are ill or homebound. For instance, many communities have meal delivery services, such as Meals-On-Wheels, at no cost to the person to help you feed them.[20]
Also, consider organizations the person is associated with. For instance, veterans may be entitled to some benefits. Members of Elk and Mason lodges may have some care provided. Also, church members are often willing to step up when members need care. Don’t be afraid to look at all your resources.

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Put your energy into the most essential tasks. That is, consider which tasks you could find ways of not doing yourself, such as ordering meals in or hiring a cleaning service. These services wouldn’t require people coming in as much as professional caregiving help, but they would help relieve some of the pressure on you.[21]
There’s no way to prepare for a serious illness in the family, especially one that seems to come out of the blue. We all learn how to cope with minor ailments as we age, but there’s no set path for navigating all the aspects of a more serious condition and its effects on the family. And the truth is every family copes differently. However, there a few things to keep in mind when caring for your loved one.

This isn’t just a major life change for the sick individual. It affects everyone in the household, especially you, as the patient’s spouse or significant other, who may face new responsibilities of caring for your partner.

Caring for your loved one
Depending on the condition, a person may be stuck in bed for most of the day with limited ability to engage in simple tasks, such as cooking, bathing and dressing. The first step of caretaking is making sure your partner’s basic physical needs are being met. You may need to rearrange your work schedule and other responsibilities so you can prepare meals, draw warm baths and help your loved one get dressed.

And remember, you don’t have to do it perfectly—and you don’t have to do it all yourself. Ordering takeout or hiring cleaning help is acceptable, as is asking friends and relatives to help. Avoid getting overwhelmed by the daily tasks. Consider designating one day a week for laundry and cooking meals that can be frozen and reheated later.

In addition, if your partner’s illness requires frequent trips to see a doctor or stays in the hospital, you may find yourself spending a lot of time in unfamiliar environments. Getting to know the staff at the medical facilities by being friendly and considerate may help make the experience more comfortable for everyone.

One dilemma you may face is whether to stay overnight at a hospital with your spouse for an extended time or to leave him or her and sleep at home. That’s a personal decision and one that includes considering your own ability to get the rest you need in that environment so you’ll have the energy to cope with your new responsibilities.

Besides being there for your loved one physically, you may have to figure out how to best communicate with him or her. There will likely be costly medical bills, as well as decisions regarding treatment and taking time off from work that need to be discussed. Your spouse may be reluctant to talk about such matters and may be unwilling or unable to deal with them on top of the health issues. This may leave a great deal of responsibility on your shoulders. If he or she is able, perhaps you can ask your spouse if there is a time you can set aside to discuss these practical matters, instead of bringing them up regularly.
When it comes to expressing your concerns, you can try writing them down in a journal instead of overwhelming your spouse with them all at once. Then, you can pick and choose which ones are worth talking about.

When speaking directly to an ill loved one, try to speak in a softer tone and use “I” statements. Also, don’t forget to inquire about how he or she feels. It’s important to treat your partner like an adult, even if the rest of your duties feel more like mothering.

Compromising may be much more efficient than trying to tell your partner what to do and will help them to rebuild some of the confidence they may have lost in recent days.

Also, don’t be afraid to ask for outside help. Maybe there is another family member or a friend who is skilled at finances and can help with the paperwork. Or perhaps your best friend is an amazing cook—take her up on her offer for a homemade dinner.

Taking care of yourself

One of the scariest aspects of taking care of a sick spouse is not knowing how long it will be until things get back to normal or wondering if they ever will. Also, you’ll probably be coping with a flurry of mixed emotions, from worry to stress to guilt, making it easy to get overwhelmed.

With the patient not being able to work, it may be up to you to provide for the household. However, this may be difficult if you also need to be there for your significant other 24/7. Financial problems in addition to an ill partner can place a tremendous amount of stress on an individual.

This is why it’s crucial that you learn to take care of yourself and manage your mental well-being. It may feel like you have no time for yourself, but it’s important to consider what small things you can do to employ self-care. Perhaps it’s doing deep breathing in bed for 10 minutes in the morning or at night, finding time to take a short walk outdoors or watching your favorite TV show when you get home in the evening.
The most important thing to remember is that you don’t need to go it alone. Finding a support network can make all the difference. Caring for a sick loved one may be a new experience for you, and your friends or family members may have trouble understanding. You might be thinking that no one knows what it’s like, and you may be tentative to take advice and accept sympathy for your situation.

However, building a support system can be what it takes to keep you positive and emotionally healthy. Find another caretaker to talk to, whether it is in an online community, a community support group or a caring friend.

It’s important not to keep your feelings bottled up, which is why you should consistently talk to people you love and trust. If you can’t shake the feeling that you are burdening them or aren’t feeling understood, you might find it helpful to seek the services of a therapist, who can offer you unbiased guidance. Moreover, professionals are trained to help you deal with situations like this and have likely dealt with others in similar circumstances.
As a primary caregiver your first priority is to take care of your sick loved one. Your second priority should be to take care of yourself. The financial, emotional, and physical stress you are under is immense.

Due to these pressures, primary caregivers often become sick themselves, which won’t allow you to take care of your loved one. Here are 10 important tips for maintaining your health so you can be the best caregiver possible.

Attend to your own healthcare needs.
Get proper rest and nutrition.
Exercise regularly, even if only for 10 minutes at a time.
Take time off without feeling guilty.
Learn to delegate. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
Stay social. Make it a priority to visit regularly with others. Nurture your close relationships.
Continue to do the things you enjoy, such as work or hobbies.
Take advantage of community services, such as day care or transportation services.
Set realistic goals. Focus on what you can provide, and realize no one is a “PERFECT”.
Remember the care you give makes a difference. Focus on the positives as they occur, and enjoy your time together.
No one can prepare us for the experience of taking care for a seriously ill family member or friend. When sickness strikes someone close to us, there may be a sense of chaos, urgency, and confusion. Details must be agreed upon, phone calls made, and appointments kept. You’d like to sit and catch your breath, but there’s likely a list of tasks, and you’re already running behind.

Illness has a way of sweeping the rug right out from under us. Some illnesses are chronic, part of our loved one’s day-to-day existence. Whether chronic or acute, you’ve got a lot on your mind, heart, and plate. This blog is written for you — here are just some of the things that I went through recently, after my father having a major heart attack, and five ways you can make the experience easier on you and those around you:

1. Get centered.

Stop, for just a moment, and look at your daily routine. Are you getting enough nutritious food? Enough sleep? Are you able to go for a walk, even around the grounds of the hospital? Take a minute to make sure you include some element of self-care. I learned this the hard way; I wasn’t eating or getting sleep, throughout the day I used to sit in the hospital with a large cup of coffee and very little food. I started realizing my body and mind weren’t functioning properly. All I could think about was that my father was on the ventilator and he was getting food through the tube, but I needed to take care of myself in order to take care of my dad and my family. After I started taking care of myself, I felt much stronger and more focused.

2. Get answers.

Got a question about your loved one’s treatment? Ask. Noticing a new symptom or a side effect of medication? Tell someone. It doesn’t hurt to ask or to speak up. Knowledge is power. I had no clue which machines were for what, but I asked tons and tons of questions. I needed to know what was going on, what was next, what medicines is he on. I know at one point the staff wanted to strangle me! But it was OK; they knew how stressed and upset we all were, and they expected that.

3. Get support.

It can be easy to isolate yourself and lose touch with your friends and family, but having concerned loved ones who can be there for you is vital. Allow others in. If you can, remain involved in school, work, and activities you enjoy. Some days you may need to share how you’re feeling with a friend. Other days you may not be able to give one more status report and just want someone to go to a movie with you. Friends and family can be a vital part of your wellness team. I know every time I saw familiar face at the hospital, I felt happy and at ease.
4. Get control.

“Control? You’ve got to be kidding!” I felt like nothing was within my control. But hear me out. What can you control right now? You can prioritize your day in any way available to you: “I will spend an hour at the hospital this morning, and when Dad goes down for X-rays, I’ll go down to the coffee shop and call a friend.” Getting control may also mean knowing your limitations.

5. Get hope.

When someone is diagnosed with serious illness, it may be hard to know what the future holds. There’s a fine line between facing a significant medical diagnosis, and holding on to hope for recovery. You may find yourself wavering between hoping for the best and fearing the worst. You’re not alone. Finding peace and balance can come as you work through the barrage of feelings, thoughts, and fears that are an inherent part of serious medical crises. Reach out to your support system, and allow others to help.

Life holds no guarantees, but knowing this doesn’t make it any easier when you face a medical crisis. You’re not alone. Even though others can’t relate to how you’re feeling specifically, allow them to help. Find quiet moments for reflection alone, as well as connection with your sick loved one, and if you begin to feel your level of distress is overwhelming, reach out and talk to someone you trust. And, of course, stay positive!

Now my father is doing much better; he is still recovering for major heart damage, but he’s in great spirits.
Keep your mind limber. In addition to the fact that staying mentally active is emotionally rewarding, studies have shown that there is a correlation between mentally challenging activities and a decreased risk of Alzheimer’s. Never stop learning, even if you feel like you’re “past your prime.”[1]
There are some simple ways you can exercise your mind. For example, you can try taking a different route to work, or brush your teeth with the hand you don’t normally use.[2]
Read more, and challenge yourself with your reading selection. Alternate between reading those pulp mystery novels you love, and classics like selections by Hemingway, Twain, and London.
Solve puzzles and play games of strategy. These sort of games engage you mentally. You could also learn to play an instrument. All of these activities have been linked to improved memory.

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Strengthen your relationships. Prioritize developing meaningful relationships above simply being social. Surround yourself with people that enrich your life and make you happy. Practice self-disclosure, which means sharing things that are unique to you (your thoughts, fears, favorite movies and music, pet peeves, etc.) with those you trust. This has been shown to be of immense importance to not only forging deeper interpersonal connections, but also feeling validated emotionally. Rutgers article on self-disclosure in personal relationships
Learn how to have a healthy relationship. Be open about what you are feeling, try to understand what others are feeling, and be willing to compromise. If you think you’re in a manipulative or controlling relationship, get out of it. It’s better to stand strong on your own than be held back by a so-called companion.
Make the time to stay connected to your close friends. This does not just mean posting a Youtube video to their Facebook page every once in a while. If you live far away from your close friends, take the time to call them once every week. If you live near your best friends, make time each week to stop in and catch up (even if you both have busy work weeks/families etc.) Many studies show that people with a wide range of social contacts get sick less than those who don’t. Friends make you laugh, and laughing is also an important part of health.
Enrich your sex life. In addition to the psychological benefits of a healthy sex life such as reduced depression, a healthy sex life has been shown to have a wide variety of health advantages including increased immunity, decreased pain, and better fitness.[3] Better still, it’s something you can do with or without a partner. If you do have a partner or partners, be sure to practice safe sex.
Pursue your passions. Set some time aside to practice an instrument, do an art project, take photos, build models, weld, bake gourmet cakes, or whatever else enriches your free time. If you want to learn something new, take an evening or weekend class. If you can’t think of anything interesting off the top of your head, take the time to find a hobby.
If you’re convinced that there isn’t enough time in the day to pursue any activities, try to cut back on a time-wasting activity like channel-surfing or hitting refresh on Facebook. You may be surprised by how much time you actually spend in front of a screen when you could be doing other things.
Join a group or club. Meeting up with people who share a common interest will both get you out of the house and boost your sense of belonging. Join a book club, a sports team, or a walking group. Pick up a community newspaper to find listings of clubs located in your area.

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Learn how to understand your emotions. It is important to be aware of what you are feeling. When you are in touch with your emotions, you will be able to both recognize when you are acting out because of your emotions and empathize more thoroughly with others. Knowing yourself is a key part of having good mental health–it’s important to know when something is making you unhappy so that you can either fix it or cut it out of your life. Likewise, it is also good to recognize the things that make you happy. Surrounding yourself with good energy will promote a happier, healthier you.
Go to a meditation group and learn how to focus your mind on the positive. Speak with a therapist who will help you sort through your emotions. Enroll in an emotional awareness course that teaches you to recognize, accept, and understand your emotions.
Learn how to cope with emotional pain and, if necessary, deal with emotional abuse. Speak with a therapist or someone you trust. Bottling up your feelings will only make your mental state more cluttered.

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Boost your karma points. Doing good will make you feel good. When you put positive energy out into the universe, that positive energy will come back to you. Improving the lives of others will in turn, improve your own mental state because you will know that you have done good by someone else.
If you have some spare time, allocate that time to helping others. Volunteer at a soup kitchen or animal shelter. Work in the community garden or simply help a friend in some way.

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Be aware of stressful factors in your life. Stress is unavoidable–whether you are running late for work, or have to get a shot at the doctor’s office, it is normal to feel stressed out. However, you can reduce your stress and learn how to manage your reaction to stressful things.