The aim of every person is to remain happy. And happiness does not depend on how much one has but what one makes of what one has.
There is not a day passes when situations that confront us need handling. Some seem so complicated leaving an unsettled feeling which in turn robs us of our sleep.
There is a simple way how one can deal with this.
First and foremost situations need to be categorized
– those which need outside help
– those that could be handled independently
-situations that do not interfere with our day to day life
– situations that we can live without
– situations that are imminent and need attention on priority basis
We tend to give undue importance to trivial such as a drift between friends or with extended family. These take a lot of our time and energy and when they are in a category where one depends on others for rapprochement for example that is a sheer waste of time.
What is required for our survival are the issues that should be dealt with first. Other issues could be called the frills which are really not important.
Once ‘picking wheat from chaff’ is done and we know situations that need to be sorted out those should get top priority so that one can smoothly handle one day at a time. Loading oneself with unsolved but unimportant matters can only make one’s life miserable.
We see kids coming from school all upset because their friend was rude to them or some such thing. Instead of talking about what they learnt in school that matter goes to the back burner.
Picking wheat from chaff is an art and a lot of thinking goes into it. It is only after spending some good time over it that a list will emerge. In this process one will also learn how one was giving importance to things that are really not necessary for one’s survival.
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My aim in life was always to become happier person and better mother. Nothing to me shall be more important or will be. I have career like gym coach but still stand very much family oriented and children oriented. that gives me not just happiness but security and being needed and useful. I admit some friends try take more time but with years I know how to send them messages to spare some tiem later because I am busy. They have to understand, it is not easy to be with family.
Mulling over issues that we can do without destroys happiness. You have the right kind of approach.
For some reason, some people need to identify the root cause of their feeling unhappiness. Once it was being determined, then happiness will follow. It takes time to achieve such goal. The good thing, we are trying to achieve it.
I wrote this Blog based on my own personal experience. I have wasted many years mulling over issues which I now realise were not needed for my happiness. As they say better late than never. Today I have created a world where I spend time on issues that are pertinent to my happiness.
For me, happiness is the act of contentment into one's life having a some sort of solitude to enjoy the thing you want, having an inner peace of mind and heart. Honestly speaking, there is no such thing as happiness in this world but amidst all the decieving apperances in this world suffering is the only true one. Real happiness came from God, and we can achieve that eternal happiness by means of prayers, sacrifice, and devotion that somehow throughout our journey in this valley of tears at the end of our journey we will find our Loving Father in heaven to be in his arms, and to be with him and share the joys with him in paradise that was meant for us in the very beginning of the creation. Our life here on earth is like a passing journey. Like a clouds in the sky. It's here a little while then its gone. We will pass in this world but once so we must make the most of it! For our final inevitable destination is death.
As you have said contentment is the key to happiness and that we can get if we know how to pick wheat from chaff. There is plenty of chaff in our life and if we know the art of finding out what is wheat and what is chaff we have reached.
That is a good approach. We all wanted to live a happy life but sometimes its hard to reach. Sometimes there are stress, anger, burden and many more that burden us to fulfill our happy life. But maybe we can do it not instantly but through the guidance of our Lord. Be contented of what we have and always give thanks.
@SuperD You can start paying more attention to situations that help you survive. When you do this those other issues that are not important will fade away slowly.