May 11, 2016 at 6:14 pm

@Christi  You are right. It is pathetic to see old folks so helpless and penniless. It is all their fault.

May 11, 2016 at 6:52 pm

@bestwriter Yes, I totally agree with you. I always like the grandparents to spend time with the grandchildren, and also children of course, but the parents’ responsibility should really give back to the parents, not the grandparents. 🙂

Yes, there are surely some conflicts while bringing up kids. I am really glad that though my parents, parents in law and our thoughts on this are quite different, they respect us as parents. So, we always have the decision on how we want to bring up our kids. Of course, it took time for us to reach this stage. At the beginning, when we first became parents, they did not trust us to be able to do this job well, so they actually interfered more. Slowly, they found out that we actually have the capability to raise our children well, so they understand us and trust us more too.

I guess this is something grandparents or parents need to learn to let go. As parents, I know I will surely have to let go of my children when they have grown up, I can’t just tie them with me all the time. They should go free when they are ready.

May 11, 2016 at 10:02 pm

@bestwriter @kaka135 I firmly believe that parents and not grandparents should be in charge of bringing up children.

Grandparents either tend to be too lenient towards grandchildren and bribe them with things which totally spoils the personality of children. Most cannot keep an eye on children’s activities in a way parents can.  

Grandparents should be involved in ways like eating meals together, going out for trips and shopping grocery or numerous other small ways but when it comes to discipline or independence it  is parents who should set the rules and have final say.

May 11, 2016 at 11:25 pm

@dawnwriter Yes, I agree with you. I guess, we just need to let the parents be the parents. They need to learn as well. Moreover I always think it’s a blessing to be parent, so we should really play our role and enjoy the play.

Sometimes the grandparents can be too strict and still like to use their way to discipline the children too – spank, shame, blame, scold, etc. 😀

I always think parents should have the final say, of course, they need to respect their parents as well, but they should not create any confusion to the young children, whether or not they should listen to the grandparents or parents?

But I guess the situation of seniors might be different in different societies. Those senior people that I know have always been helping out the take care of the grandchildren, and it’s actually their children are relying on them more often, unless those who have mentioned in the previous comments, the seniors are really dependent on their children.

May 12, 2016 at 5:41 am

While you are still breathing, I guess you need to plan for the future. We do not know where our time is up but it doesn’t mean we stop from there. It is good to always plan. Plan is a guidance for a goal to achieve. If the goal is not targeted, change the plan not the goal. I still plan, though recently it doesn’t work for me because I always think I am the jinx. Talking about negativities in here.