Seniors and you
Seniors are a disillusioned lot part of which has a lot to do with their own thinking.
Let’s put seniors at ease.
Planning for the future
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Seniors should plan for their future. Have you planned?
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I noticed that old folks don’t plan for their future. For example, my parents and my parent in laws. They are in their 70’s and 80s. Still, they are living with their older or youngest child. When they were in their middle age, they slogged like hell, for the sake of the family, fed the kids, educate them but they do not keep aside some money for their old age. Hence, they are penniless, had to depend on their kids (adult) to care for them. They had no where to go except the old age home which they would rather not choose. My hubby said that we shouldn’t depend on our kids when we are old. We should start planning for our old age future lives without them. They have their own family to build then. We have our paradise lifestyle to live then |
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I think it is a big mistake not to plan for the future whether you are young and old. As parents, we are also spending a lot of money on our children’s school fees and other necessities but I do not want to be dependant on them ever even if they are very obedient and supportive. It is best to save money on a regular basis and find ways of investing safely. @peachpurple Your husband has the right idea!
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Very well said.
It is not just financial dependence but when seniors depend on their children then the children’s thinking becomes law. The seniors become vulnerable and mess up their life totally. |
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Planning should start at an early age. |
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I agree with you. We as parents, should start to plan for our old age plan now , at our 40s. We need to invest our savings into other places where we could accumulate interest . That means more money, easier lifestyle in future. Then, we don’t have to worry when we are old. We don’t have to show our hands to our kids, asking them for money. They would despise us, not feel sorry or give us with a willing heart. Who knows, is future, they would be the one asking us for money instead !
That is what my hubby said because he had seen his friends and his siblings , growing old but not financially stable. It is alike begging your kids to take you in.
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I agree that all of us should actually plan for our future, not just the seniors. My parents already have plans for themselves, so even though we can’t support them financially, they can still live a good life. As children, we just always remind them to spend if they wish to, and there is no need to leave the money for us. Some parents here would like to leave money to the children. We still try to support our parents financial as much as we can. But being a work from home mom that don’t earn much, I can only give them a little bit, just to show my gratitude to them. I always think it’s good to teach our children to be independent. So I agree with what @dawnwriter said, we should have our plans in future, and children will have to plan for themselves as well. @bestwriter I think I am really blessed to have my parents. They do not depend on us very much, as they understand we have our own families and work to do as well, they even try to help us as much as they can. They have their own friends and also their activities, so I am happy for them and not too worry about them as well. They also always come and visit us and stay with us sometimes. So, they are not burdens for us at all. |
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@Lee Ka Wish many seniors did that. They will empty their coffers for their kids and the kids will throw their hands up. |
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@peachpurple Hope you will put to practice the suggestions you have made here. All the best. |
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 Anonymous
Topics: 48 Replies: 145
Rank: Newbie
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Its actually difficult for old folks to plan now for their future – cause they are already living it. The fact that if seniors now were not able to plan ahead can cause them a whole lot of difficulties especially in their 70’s, 80’s and 90’s. I find it heartbreaking that most older folks tend to just wait for the moment when everything will end. |
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@bestwriter Frankly speaking, sometimes I think the seniors I know here take care of their children and grandchildren too much. My uncle and aunt are taking care of their grandchildren, sending and picking them from school, they even help to check their homework. These should be done by the parents, not the grandparents, though I understand their daughter is too busy at work, so they help a lot. Glad that my cousin sister treats them very well and fully support them financially as well. It’s just that, they do not have much of their personal time, especially when the children were still young. I also sometimes told my mom to let my younger sister take care of her children on her own, she’s always afraid my younger sister couldn’t handle the two young children. I always told them, we must learn to grow up. She has learned and done her part very well, and now it’s time for us to learn and do our part. If I didn’t insist, my parents are always here to help me out too. It seems to me that the seniors I know are quite different from those you all discussed here. I think they should enjoy their life more, as they have been working hard for quite a long time, now they should relax and do what they really like to do. Well, perhaps many of them still enjoy taking care of the children and grandchildren as well. |
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@Lee ka Grandparents want to stay in the loop so that they are of some use to the family. They are worried they will be rendered useless if they do not contribute. I see this happening here all over. |
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@bestwriter I do not think my parents and aunts think that, as they actually have their own activities to do and their friends in home town. But it’s just that they might be too protective to the children, or the children are too dependent on them, so they just have to help out the children. Of course, they are always happy to help the children. I just think that the children (I mean my generation) need to learn to take care of our children on our own, and let our parents be free. We can’t just think that we need to work, so we always ask our parents for help to take care of our children. Some of my friends’ parents even stay in another state or country to help to take care of their grandchildren, but the grandparents actually prefer to stay in their home town, as there are more friends in the home town, as compared to a foreign country or state. Of course, I think it’s good to let the grandparents and grandchildren have some family time together, but I just think we should let the grandparents rest more and do what they want to do, but not give them the responsibility of taking care of the grandchildren. Well, it’s just my thought. I said these because I have heard those grandparents complaining that they have no time for themselves because they have to take care of the grandchildren. 😀
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Lee Ka. Grandparents could be around but not take on the responsibility |
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@Lee Ka There is also the issue about clash of ideas on how to bring up kids. |
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