May 12, 2016 at 3:02 am

I grew up in an abusive household…mental, physical and sexual abuse.  In a recent blog (that is awaiting approval) I wrote about how I suffer flashbacks from the verbal abuse. I know in past relationships I fell for abusive partners because I thought that was the “norm.”

Abuse has health issues, like when the physical abuse, you suffer broken bones, cuts…signs that are visible.  Mental and sexual abuse are often deep rooted and are often not recognized because you can’t see the scars.  With these types of abuse come mental health issues, like depression or PTSD and other mental issues.

Have you suffered from abuse?  Do you have other mental abuses that are related from your abuse?

May 12, 2016 at 5:05 am

I know I suffered abuse from my father, verbal abuse, not specifically to me but to my mother. My father verbally abuse my mother and I know it affects my decision to get myself to have my own family, to tie up in a marriage because I don’t want that to happen to me too.I don’t want a very abusive husband. I am praying he is not that kind. Up until now there is some abuse that is happening but I am glad that my mother is a strong lady and she overcomes it always. She is fighting with my father defending herself and I am there for here to defend her too.

May 12, 2016 at 7:50 pm

@grecy095, absolutely!!  Seeing a parent being abused can also cause problems in one’s life as well.  Some times we fall into situations that are abused parents go through, thinking that that is the way all women should be treated and that’s NOT right either.  Glad you mentioned this, because you witnessed abuse to your mother and that can have effects on you.

May 13, 2016 at 1:38 pm

it affects me big time @4cryingoutloud because it makes me not try to say yes to a suitor and start relationship because I am thinking I will end the same way. Though my parents are like that, they never gave up with each other and that is making me inspired as well, but still the abuse is there.

May 13, 2016 at 7:00 pm

@grecy095, oh definitely it probably does affect your relationships.  I think that is why I was attracted to alcoholics, they were abusive.  I was even attracted to men that were 10 years older, looking for a “father” figure.  It’s hard to get over, when you’re around abuse, because you think that is “normal.” 🙁

May 14, 2016 at 2:17 pm

@4cryingoutloud exactly. The feeling of it is normally happening at home makes me think it is normal indeed, that I don’t have to worry, that I need to get used to it and I never even imagine the silent impact these kinds of things to me. Whenever I will fall in love with someone, it makes me have this scary moment in my head that makes me think “oh maybe he will become my father one day” but the truth is I don’t have to worry, I just need to try, but I am still not trying.

June 19, 2016 at 2:44 pm

I am sorry to hear that you go through this. There are some women who also experience this kind of abuse. There are times women cannot move away from the source of pain because of so many factors. In the long run, they realized that it needs to stop and learn to love oneself .