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How do you deal with School Bullies?
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School Bullies had been a pain in the neck for decades. Until today, school bullies still exist due to lack of discipline, parents and teachers guidance. Most school bullies are formed by a leader who dares to do anything to get what he wanted and fame. His so called “gang” are problematic students who are willing to be in the group. They worked together to bully the weaker students, achieve what they wanted, mostly money, copy answers for homework and exam.
How you ever deal with school bullies? What did you do? Did the disciplinary teacher handled the bullies with care or punishment? Did the bullies came back for revenge? How can you help the victims? Please share with us.
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 Anonymous
Topics: 17 Replies: 163
Rank: Newbie
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In my time the teachers and parent didn’t care for the bullies at all. Nowadays the schools are different. Still, I had to teach my kid to fight back and take care of herself. There is no justice when an evil is already done. |
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This is an extremely good question, how to deal with bullies. There are so many problems with this. One resolution is to begin programs in every state similar to “Beyond Scared Straight”. From viewing this program several times, it seems to be very effective. Another resolution starts in every home; of course you cannot blame those parents who teach their children to defend themselves against bullies but for those who encourage children to become bullies, there is definitely a problem/issue. Too many times have we seen parents on television encouraging or being a part of young people fighting especially for the wrong reasons like girls fighting over boys. Why is this so important that some in this world find that this type of behavior is right. Are there not more important issues in this world that we have to deal with. This is so in remembrance of the young girl who was just recently killed in a school bathroom by girls; for what; for fighting over boys. Is this what America has come to? Encouraging a child to be a bully is despicable to say the least. There more than likely are/is problems in the home. Several reasons can define this such as a parent’s self-esteem, socioeconomic status, and etc……Some parents have issues as far as loss of employment, mental issues, and/or other family related problems but with this is a sense of self control; meaning just because one has lost their job does not mean they make a situation worse. In other words losing something then taking it out on the ones that you are suppose to love the most. Some bullies just want attention and will do whatever necessary to get it. Why? Again there must be some issues that need to be address. When the word mental disorder is mentioned some think that is inappropriate but mental disorders can be classified as minor to major like anything else. For one to think that they are better than others is a disorder. So bullies who prey on the weak need some type of intervention and to come to a course of action and decrease the behaviors so that more good results are the focus. |
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Anonymous
Topics: 17 Replies: 163
Rank: Newbie
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You can deal with bullies pretty effectively, but you actually have to have a system in school that is appose to it. IN my time nobody bothered about it, we were all both the infiltrators and inflicted – but I don’t and I can’t put a blame on the kids, but on the teachers. Parents were not with us in the school, so they can’t be responsible fr something that is not happening in front of them.
Yes, the parents can talk and educate child, but I think that a main reason why bullies thrive in some schools and in some not is because of the teachers.
Once my friend was beaten up in the school yard just a few feet away from our teachers. We were very small, I think 4th grade, but she done absolutely nothing to prevent it.
A school IO placed my kid at has a very strict rules about this plus parents are making a huge fuss if somebody comes home with a blue eye. I think we have advanced a lot.
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@rapidblue/ thanks for your share. In the past , most parents do not bother much about bullies . maybe they are uneducated, couldn’t understand what bullies are all about. Now in the modern world, bullies still exist. Sometimes the victims themselves dare not speak up to teachers and parents which is the reason why the bullies dare to repeat the same mistake over and over again. However, in our local school, there is a disciplinary teacher who is in charge of bullying cases. Due to the number of students committing to suicides in school, at home, etc, the schools are taking measures to reduce the cases. Maybe for the sake of the students or the school reputation. |
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There is something to do with the parents of the bullies, their upbringing, the environment and the support of all of them. I guess if they found out that a certain child becomes a bully, they need to ask them the reason why, or study their actions. There is always a reason why a bully is a bully. Maybe they are seeing the same treatment at home, they are hurt and they need to make other’s feel it so that they are not the only one having the pain. I guess that is the reason why they always wants attention.
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I was horribly bullied throughout my school years. After 3rd grade (age 9) I had to transfer schools because I’d been jumped by all the girls in my class and thrown into a bee infested bathroom, and locked in. They’d wanted me to get stung to death and die. By 7th grade, bullying by not only my peers but school staff began. I was being abused at home and started telling adults about it – they would make fun of me for having dirty clothes, not having school supplies, or downright call me a liar about the abuse. One guidance counselor said I would never even graduate high school. In high school, the teasing by peers stopped but the bullying by staff continued. My interesting fashion choices were ridiculed, I was insulted, and after I’d earned a full scholarship to college I was told I shouldn’t go. My mom, a bully herself, taught me to be very passive to bullies and told me I should ignore them. This got me continually bullied throughout my life. I will never teach my children that – I will teach them to stand up and defend themselves. |
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Dear Lola, It is terrible that you had to experience these things. I wish that no one has to deal with bullies at anytime in their life. I also would like to address other posts about bullies. First let’s take a look at the word harassment. Harassment is aggressive or intimidation. I have experience intimidation but it lasted may be two minutes in which a girl in my high school called herself yelling at me; I looked at her like she was crazy; I guess because I am not use to anyone yelling at me except my parents. She did nothing further. Throughout my elementary and high school years for some reason or another I always seemed to have physical confrontations with boys; one of who “got it good” because he would not stop making sexual advances. I believe I blackened his eye. Anyway, back to harassment; one post that stated that some parents are uneducated is correct. Many law official are good people, of course there are some who could care less. With that being said, I would think that the law prohibits any type or kind of harassment. So the saying goes; report, report, report. I probably would have reported incidents of bullying so much that they would have gotten tired of listening to me and seeing me. I really despise when people have to be subjected to this type of treatment (bullying). I don’t know but stricter penalties may help. |
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@peachpurple That was not applicable on me. Being a tall and well built guy right from my school days and a sportsman with my own team the bullies would think twice or even more before doing anything like that. |
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In response to Rapidblue. Sometimes kids are to blame due to peer pressure or wanting to be part of a group. It is sometimes similar to these sororities or fraternities where you have certain types that “hang” together and insult or “put down” those who do not have the same interests or status. As far as parents are concerned; yes it is true that they cannot be responsible for what they do not know. That happens often but it is parents responsibility to know what is going on with their children. Some children hide a lot of things from their parents like sexual matters, who their friends are, and if they are involved with drugs and etc…., why is this? It may be due to communication barriers as to why it is so important to keep the lines of communication open. And with the teacher who did not report the fighting incident; someone has to step up and report incidents like this. When things like this happen and no one reports it it only makes room for something even worse or horrific to occur like murder. |
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We have a big poster at the entrance of our school that says “Bullies are human. They deserve our love and understanding. Let’s be their friend.” Wow! it really works. I was surprised that those hard-headed pupils come to my office unexpectedly and confess to me that they’re the bullies. I appreciate their honesty and praise their concern. As a result, I organize them and become the watchdog of the school for bullying acts. I do also call their parents and they express their gratefulness for what I have done. It takes love to tame the fiercest animal. |
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I am very sorry to hear that you were being bullied at such tender age. Whether it was verbal or physical bullied, you are helpless at that age. However, those bullies, they will meet their retribution for their bad deeds. Don’t worry, God has good pair of eyesight. As for your children, you did the right thing, stand up for your rights and fight those bullies off. When I was a school age girl, I stood up for my younger brother when he was bullied by a few older boys in the school bus. I yelled at them and showed them my fist. Honestly, I almost peed my pinafore but they had stopped bullying my brother. you are one lucky guy with big built and tall height. of course the bullies who are shorter than you felt smaller, they wouldn’t touch you at all. I wished I had a big brother like you when I was young. Then, I could feel safer. Your siblings must had feel saved too. Good to show those bullies to think twice before landing their hands on you. |
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@peachpurplen height is an advantage in our family we are four brothers and all stand over 6′ I am 6’2 next to me is 6’1 3rd is 6’3 and the last one is 6’1 but my sister is shorter she is only 5’7 but that too is not that bad considering the average Indian height. You can consider me as your big brother and let me know in case of a problem. I often stop at KL airport for 3-4 hours every time I go to Australia and Malaysian Airlines is my favorite one.
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I agree with you sis. The parents of the bullies should look into the matter once the headmaster had address the bullying cases. However, some “rich parents” think that bullying is not their job to rectify the matter. It is the teachers’ In some cases, “poor parents” think bullying is not a big deal. Which I disagree all of them. Bullying should be taken seriously especially the parents. Not everything is to be blame at the teachers. Yes, I agree that the home environment and family relationship are related to bullying too. Sometimes, I asked my boy whether anyone bullied him because he wanted to bring comic books to school. He said that his classmates would say this and that if he doesn’t bring them. That is verbal bully. Anyway, he ignored that boy. Otherwise, I would have asked the teacher in charge to check that boy out! Thanks for sharing |
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wow, your siblings are pretty tall for your race. I do noticed that Indian heights are rarely short, most are tall build and muscular. You dad must be big size too. Thanks for being such a nice bro. Glad to have one here.
well you have done well, good job. It shows positive moves that those hard head students are willing to stand up and confess the truth to you. They also helped you to look out for other bullies, a wonderful way for them to repent too. Yes, most secondary schools do put up Large banners and posters at the entrance. Those signs were “Say no to bullying” which means schools are taking this case into a serious manner.
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