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| I asked that question because I have experienced the latter from my husband. I should never exposed this to anyone but my family I said to myself, but how can other people learn from others if we keep it on to ourselves? At first, it was just a simple misunderstanding but as time and days passed by, I noticed that he became aggressive and easy to become angry without any reason at all. One time when he got home, I had to asked where he was because it was two in the morning when he came home but the answer I received was a gun in my head. Many other things happened before I had the chance to call for help because he locked us inside the boarding house where we lived in. Until today I cannot forgive him to what he did to us but because of the holy matrimony that we promised on our wedding day, we have to return home to him and as our parents and relatives advice. It was not an easy decision for me because every time I saw a knife and a gun, my tears just fall again. I will share more of my experience next time. This is just the first part of it. It was also a crazy decision knowing that he could always do those things that he did but I’m hoping for his changes by the help of the Lord. He’s been attending church when we returned home but I hope one of you could give me a better advice on how to coop with my trauma.
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| @Tita, report that to police.Always have with you self defense like sharp pointed pen, I think your husband is taking illegal drugs, report him to police secretly.Call 8888 direct to the office of President Duterte. Leave him, bring that matter to police and to your barangay hall to blotter it and to DSWD. Do not wait him to kill anyone in your house. He has a killer mind. That is a scary marriage, for me, I will never come back to him.Pray to God that man to find another woman and never stop him so you have reason not to forgive him , I pray he will be caught by olice. | |
| That is really shocking @Tita. You are a very brave woman. I think you have to file a police complaint or your safety. I mean he is you husband so, he doesn’t have any right to harm you. That is against your marriage vows right? Please don’t think I am belittling your husband. If he still has the patience to hear you try to go for a counseling as it might help him to remind him of the importance of love for you and your family. I really feel sad I couldn’t help you. Please have faith in god and everything will be alright soon. I will pray to god for you. Be brave my friend and don’t lose hope. | |
| Definitely report that to the police ASAP. If you’re living in a democratic country he should get a prison sentence at least a year or so. That’s definitely act against the law trying to commit a murder. Is he living in the middle ages threatening his wife with knife and gun over simple arguments?! | |
| @Cely, yes I already filed a complaint against him so that the next time he’ll do that again I would just say sorry. And no, he undergo drug test and he got a complete negative results.
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| @ haripriya, thank you, this happened a year already and until now he is good so far so I’m always praying for his total changes. | |
| @basboh, I really don’t know what happened to him that time. But up to now he is trying to win back my trust that he broke. | |
| My goodness! This is indeed a very sad story. What ever happened to thr peoplr who loved us once with theor whole hearts. where do people go wrong surely, what are we not doing right? I often ask this question whenever i hear of such stories. Is that we have lost our morals? Or did our parents not teach us better ways of how to handle our issues in marriage. We could come out and give all kinds of excuses but that will not stop this trend if the root problem is not found and taken care of. Anyway we have oftenly been warned on such people. If you are in such a situation you are always adviced be on the look out, do not sit there and wait for your death to find you in that house. When someone starts showing signs of violence towards you, or they start issuing threats take cover fast and leave that house. Do not start thinking about what will happen or where you will go, that can be dealt with once you are out of that house. Never take threats for granted because it is going to turn out badly, such people just watch you and once they decide to do it they dont hesitate to do it. So please for your sake report your husband to the authorities and leave that house if your life means anything to you. | |
| @anitagimase, yes I already did that, leaving the house for almost 4 months. this happened a year now. I value my life but I most value the mandate on what the Bible say that God owns revenge. I havent fully forgiven him but there will be time for that and I always look out for changes and I always pray for better changes of his life as he just accepted the lord last December 2016. thank you guys for giving such wonderful advices. So I will be requesting for prayer support from you friends here in literacy base. | |
| this is really scary, no matter how bad your marraige is, gun should never be pointed on your head, that is a crime that cannot be forgiven. Once done, he will repeat again.
Better get away from your hubby | |
| @peachpurple, yeah I planned not to go back in the first place but when our pastor told me something but I cant tell you. The important thing for me now is he’s trying to be a good husband. But I have to watch out anytime. As I have said I’m counting on the promises God has made for you and me. I can see that he is trying his best to becomee a good husband and a father. | |
| @Tita, it seems that you love your husband so much that pity and love block your intention to have a separate ways. Time comes that he will repeat what he had done to you considering that he has a gun, By the way, is your husband a police? Why is he owning a gun? Are your children not afraid of him. The children will be affected with his attitude. I hope that your decision to remain with him won’t be regretted with tears should time come that he will repeat his action to you. he has a criminal mind.Just pray my dear. | |
| @cely, he’s not a policeman my friend but a security guard. His family took the gun and destroyed it in front of my family and barangay officials. We even had what we call in the Philippines Barangay Counseling and trial that’s why they come up with the decision to separate for 4 months. I don’t love him that much since he did what he did sis but again its because of family virtue at least now I have the police blotter statement and everybody knows what he did. It’s a year already since that happened through my prayers and the congregation as well it helps that I could see him change little by little. Yes you’re right that I should never cease in praying and thank you all for the support and care you shown here in literacy base. I was able to know another family with big hearts. | |
| @ cely, We only have one kid. I don’t plan it already to having another child. I want to focused it on him for today until having enough savings for his education as well. | |
| Please, please talk to a domestic violence agency. You really should not take yourself or your children back into danger. There is a very good web place called “Our Place” where you can talk and get information. I have also been scared in the past. Now I am free. I will retun and post a link once I have checked it. |
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