Author Posts

February 27, 2017 at 2:47 pm

I understood how wrong it is judging people on the first interaction. I had a great interaction with a man about 2 months back, he sounded so good to me. Based on that, i exclaimed how good this man is and how you can find people like him in this mundane earth where everyone is selfish and clever. And i later found that how this man was double standard and showed his true face. I kicked myself for praising him so much earlier.And at the same time i also found many people who though did not give me a good impression in the first interaction,turned out to be nice people in the end. Its important that we don’t judge anyone based on the first interaction, be it good or bad.

What do you think about this guys

February 27, 2017 at 3:32 pm

I think people always in search of other person who either impresses them, entertains them, educate them or make them smile. So judgement comes when a person who doesn’t able to do that to them. When you try to smile at people, they are going to smile back. And they are going to find you friendly. Like this there are many social hacks that can be used to avoid getting judged on first interaction.

February 27, 2017 at 4:26 pm

First impression is important for me. But I don’t trust people that easily. Based on my personal experience, there is always a pattern of betrayal. As you had mentioned, some people can deceive us easily. I need to spend more time with them and try to get to know them better. If things are not going to work out, at least, I haven’t trust this person in the first place.

I had a couple of friends before. They betrayed me and left me without looking back. At some point, they are just being with me in good times. For the bad times, they started to push away themselves from me.

I don’t want to trust people because of such bad experience from the past. I considered my family the first line of defense against these people. They are my true friends for life. I am still open for casual friends but not to trust them. Some friends can turned to be a backfighters.

 

 

February 27, 2017 at 4:57 pm

I agree that we shouldn’t judge people on the first interaction but I also believe in my intuition. If I have a good or bad feeling about someone it is usually accurate and turns out to be like that later on. Sometimes I will meet someone and then immediately feel like I cannot trust that person, or I feel an instant connection with them. It’s good to let people show you their true colors but sometimes you can tell a lot from a first interaction.

February 27, 2017 at 6:43 pm

@Ahamed Husain,It is also the same as not to judge a book through its cover.There were many times I believed the person as good and others not only to know the irony at the end.After that I learned a lesson out of that circumstance of judging a person. There are many reasons why we judge like that, and there are also reason what changes a person’s mood. Maybe that person you praised was so problematic at that time of your discouragement;however, it is also unwise to change our mood no matter how to someone who appreciated us that much.

There should be explanation why the person just changed his mood or dealing to you. Once we lost our trust to someone, it will never be restored to its original formation.I bet.

I appreciate much your blog, very true to life and all readers can gain a lesson out of the truth not to give a full trust and judgment first time.Have a good night from my home to yours.

February 28, 2017 at 11:07 am

Thanks for the comments

March 1, 2017 at 1:45 am

First impressions are important to some people but not always are first impressions what they seem. Some people love to have very good first impressions and then when they start interacting more with that person the more they will show their true colors.

 

March 1, 2017 at 2:38 pm

It is always wrong to be judgemental in the first place. But people, in general, are prejudiced. For one thing, we all think that we can be better than others and somehow we often let our egos get the better of us, right? The good thing is, while we judge, there should still be room for us to get to know the people we are judging. I for one is a person who has favorites just because and people I don’t like just because. What I usually do is I get to know the person I don’t like. I walk with them, eat with them, spend time with them and see for myself if my thoughts justify what I feel about that person. What do you know, I make more friends that way. I like the fact that I get to know them and remove all doubts altogether.

March 1, 2017 at 8:43 pm

First impressions happen; it is an inconvenient reality. When we meet someone for the first time, we judge him or her involuntarily, maybe driven by our instinct or simple social practice.

Our judgment is usually based on a perception of the person’s gestures, movements, and the way he or she talk. The rest is simply their appearance.

However, I agree with most of the comments here saying that we should not judge the person the first time we meet them. Because in the same way, we don’t want to be judged easily by other people. As the saying says, “There’s no perfection, just willingness to appreciate the uniqueness in everyone.”



 

April 6, 2017 at 2:07 pm

I never judge a person by his appearance or in the first interaction. I reserve my opinion always. It does not mean I suspect others. I always take time before reaching to a conclusion when it comes to building a human relationship. It is just like ‘NEVER JUDGE A BOOK BY ITS COVER’.

In my office, I was given a big file containing about 2000 pages written in manuscript by different officers. I have to proceed further with action contributing from comments. I just read the file in an hour and wrote down my comments in 12 lines. All were impressed.

But, a file was there with a single sheet. It was typewritten. It took me nearly 10 days to write my comments. Why? Just because the stuff needed examination of the request of the individual from various angles, rules, law position, regulation etc.,

When I was not in contact with Mr. Sayed (He became my close friend afterward) I was sitting in the corner chair of a Tea Stall. All friends were meeting there and there was a hectic discussion going on for hours on various topics. I noticed a person wearing glasses and looking very decent in a well-fitted ordinary dress (terry cotton pant and a cotton shirt). I did not know anything about him. One day, it was a holiday and I was waiting for my friend and so he too. We both were sitting there for half an hour. Finally, I just looked at him and he too. We just wished each other as both were familiar in that restaurant. The cashier was the owner of the restaurant. He laughed at us and said ‘Hi, don’t you know each other? You both sit at different places sitting and discussing various topics and subjects but still you never faced each other. Ok. Come on, guys…He is Mr. Syed…Phd. in Philosophy, and he is Mr. Shiva, doing his M.Sc in physics. We came together and after a brief introduction, we started a discussion on a topic which took nearly 2 hrs. I really could not understand the vocabulary and the fluency and command over English. I realized that it is time for me to join in his friend’s group who are more elders to me. Even then, we were discussing on many general topics and he was very much afraid of physics and was asking his doubts for clarification.

Even until today, we both are good friends. He is simple and looks simple. He wears a very simple dress. Even then, the power in his eyes tells many things about his shrewdness.

 

April 18, 2017 at 8:11 am

I believe in a saying that says that don’t judge a book by its cover.  I find it wrong when people easily judge others on the first impression. I remember some years back I was in a foreign country do some religious work now there was this certain lady when she saw me she never thought anything good can come out of me.  This lady was shocked and amazed at how much I did my work well.  She personally confused and apologized later.  The rule is never judge a book by its cover.

April 18, 2017 at 10:22 am

As the saying goes, never judge the cover of the book, is always right.

We tend to judge people at first sight or impression but often mislead by those gimmicks.

A lesson to learn by mistake but most importantly is, do not get cheated by the person.

Otherwise, count your blessings that you had found out the ugly truth earlier.

April 24, 2017 at 8:39 pm

@ahamed husain Yes are correct. As the other says also that don’t judge the book by it’s cover but it’s always unavoidable to say something after the first meeting or interaction with someone else. But sometimes your first impression can be your last, why? because some impression people locked inside their head is what that person being judge is doing in the first place. I on the other hand doesn’t make some judgement on others the destructive way but always on the positive view of who that person is. Sometimes our judgement make us blind to what’s real.

I have a Japanese friend who was been judged by one of my co-worker. At first, my co-worker told me that my friend is like a crazy dog talking to anyone whom he doesn’t even know most specially women. My co-worker said that my friend  feels like a handsome man in fact he is not just because he have a small eyes and many tattoos on his hand. I told my co-worker that the man he’s pointing out is far more greater than he is.

After 3 days, my co-worker said sorry to me because he saw my friend on the news helping in cleaning the environment of our city by picking cigarette butts and some garbage on the overpass flower garden left by irresponsible people passing by.  He was even acknowledge by the city mayor for doing so even though he is not a Filipino.

So for us, this topic enlighten us that we have to make some judgement fair.

April 24, 2017 at 10:45 pm

I go with my gut.  I don’t know why but in my life I have always had the ‘blow back’.    If I met X and something feels ‘wrong’,  no matter what he does or says or is, that ‘wrong’ stays with me.   If it has a reason okay, but in most cases it reveals itself later down; proving I was correct.

I recall meeting a chap who tried to impress me.   He tried too hard.   He was a scammer.  He didn’t scam me because I felt uncomfortable around him with all his possessions and ‘I. I, I,’ conversation.

April 25, 2017 at 6:25 am

In psychology, a first impression is the event when one person first encounters another person and forms a mental image of that person. Impression accuracy varies depending on the observer and the target (person, object, scene, etc.) being observed.[1][2] First impressions are based on a wide range of characteristics: age, race, culture, language, gender, physical appearance, accent, posture, voice, number of people present, and time allowed to process.[ The first impressions individuals give to others could greatly influence how they are treated and viewed in many contexts of everyday life.]