July 3, 2016 at 10:56 pm

We have our own ways to rebuild the broken relationship. The root cause depends on how the relationship turned sour. It could be small or big. But still, we still need to save the relationship breaks into million pieces.

First, we need to apologize and should come from the heart. It is the best feeling to forgive oneself, your partner in life or closest friends;

Second, be sure about your intentions. It should be honest and sincere about what you want in a relationship and how it will work; and

Lastly, build a strong foundation. Have an open communication and forget the past issues. Then, move on to a new chapter of one’s life.

July 5, 2016 at 3:59 pm

I can never allow myself to rebuild the  broken relationship . The pain is not easy to deal . It takes years to repair the broken heart. My ex wanted to reconcile, I told him, everything was dead. I told him never to force a scar be opened again for the virus may spread in different angles and he may not anymore spare himself.

July 5, 2016 at 5:49 pm

I want to tell you and be frank and honest about this. When my wife and I quarreled over personal matters and exchanged vindictive for several minutes. I have to leave her at home and go some place to let my hurt feelings subside. After an hour or so, I go home. And we become friends as if nothing had happened.

We never mentioned a single thing about what had made us become hostile. We never bring back those things. Nothing really has happened to us. That is our attitude. We could easily get reconciled in a minute or so. There is a time that I have asked my wife about that. She didn’t know why. That is how she behaved after a misunderstanding, disagreement, or whatever.

Even our children are surprised that we could easily come to terms after the “war”. Even myself, I couldn’t explain it. I think we are one that we don’t have to harbor grudges between us. Quarrel, bickerings, cold war are part of the life of every being. And no one could solve that but they themselves. That is what we feel.

July 5, 2016 at 9:11 pm

@lovern It seems your heart was shattered by your ex-partner. I also do think that it is not easy to forgive and forget. I guess it depends on the degree of being hurt. Recently, I had broken up with my ex-partner because of an unacceptable situation. I tend to forgive her but I totally forget her. Thus, I don’t want any connections with her in any directions of my life. I understand what you feel right now.

July 5, 2016 at 9:18 pm

@nakitakona13 I must say that the love binds you and your wife too strong. This misunderstanding is normal for a couple to experience. Issues can be forgotten easily since it was being let out while having arguments. In some point, it spices the marriage life.

I also do the same thing with my exes. However, pride made them so high to reach out. In fact, I haven’t found the right person whom I can be respected and accepted my flaws. My longtime relationship had just ended 2 months ago. At first, I thought she is the one. But then, it turned out to have full of deceptions from her. But I do think, it is so ideal to have an open communication to resolve the issue right away.

July 6, 2016 at 10:02 am

@Shavkat, That is true, it is not easy to forget the past full of toxic struggles. I may forgive him , but he can never persuade me again.What is one time heartache? It is equivalent to a life time suffering and the pain is also enduring. I am happy that you too had a gut to forget and forgive your former ex partner.

July 6, 2016 at 10:08 am

@lovern I did it for the sake of living peacefully. I cannot dwell in hell of such relationship. It is a good thing that I managed to move on. If not, I still living in misery. There is also a point that my ex-partner offering the platonic relationship. I turned it down. It doesn’t work for me. It is better to leave things behind and never turn back.

July 6, 2016 at 10:19 am

@Shavkat, How could it be having a platonic relationship when you will be leaving under one roof. I thin that is only her defense mechanism so she could always be with you. In my case, someone went to school to convince me to reconcile, the more that I was mad. I told the person why can’t you realize your approach is wrong. I told him :”tell my ex that the past cannot be brought to present.

July 6, 2016 at 3:04 pm

@lovern My ex-partner and I are not living together. It is a good thing that we didn’t go far in marriage. She wanted to continue the relationship with me but not in a romantic relationship. So I just cannot accept the offer from her. It wasn’t healthy to have communication with her after all the things done.

July 6, 2016 at 5:31 pm

Okay what you have shared is true but for m,e when a relationship breaks i never go back at it it is usually done for me. coz what i believe is that by the time you were breaking up with me you had made up your mind that you do not want me for a certain reason, so i won’t break myself coming over to apologize if the problem was not on my side. and if someone wants to leave i always let them free to go for their time in my life is well over.

July 6, 2016 at 6:26 pm

@sauda I also do the same thing. If it is over, then it is over. However, there are times that we need some closure in a relationship. Then, it is about time for me to move on and learn to forgive and forget this person. I cannot also continue a relationship when it is totally broken in the first place.

July 7, 2016 at 6:00 am

I prefer to go to the route of the trouble thrash it out and then get back to a relationship whoever that be friends, siblings…  But that is not what is happening. There is a break and then they come back wanting to rebond. I just do not like it as there will be a repetition of hurt.

I do not feel comfortable having them back if they have not made up.

July 7, 2016 at 7:15 am

@bestwriter Some people believed that second time around love affair is sweeter than the first one. But then, it doesn’t happen to every individual. I also agree with you that it is not healthy to cling to someone if hurt for so many times. It will not be going to work for me.

July 7, 2016 at 8:37 am

I agree with you but not before the hurts are removed and they are not repeated. I just do not like the tendency of some that just want a re-connect without dealing on the hurts which in my opinion they will just fester. Just like removing a thorn that pricks us. If it is not removed then they will fester inside.

July 7, 2016 at 9:44 am

@Shavkat There is an old saying in one of my regional languages which if translated says, “You can tie a knot in a broken rope but it would be visible and never as strong as it used to be”.